


love is like a role that we play

by Bontaque



Category: The Following
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anxiety, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Food Issues, Humiliation, M/M, Manipulation, Multi, Polyamory, Sexuality Crisis, Situational Humiliation, Stuffing, Verbal Humiliation, Weight Gain, Weight Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-16
Updated: 2014-07-31
Packaged: 2018-02-09 03:48:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1967799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bontaque/pseuds/Bontaque
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A self indulgent bastardisation of the events in the farmhouse over the first season of The Following. Events changed for weight gain kink reasons. Jacob gains a little weight, Emma hates it and Paul really doesn't.</p><p>((I've been working on this since January; it's finished but not fully edited yet. More tags will be added as the story is and it should be complete within 1/2 weeks))</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sublime_jumbles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sublime_jumbles/gifts).



> Notes: Okay so this is really slow burn for everything. I planned to make Emma's and Paul's opinions on his weight gain confuse Jacob but it kind of edges into eating disorder territory (of the weight loss kind) but it ends up with Jacob in a much better state of mind.
> 
> Inspired, co-imagined and beta'd by [Hannah](http://archiveofourown.org/users/sublime_jumbles/pseuds/sublime_jumbles). This would have never happened without her. It was supposed to be ~2K words holy shit.

The farmhouse that they took Joey to was far from small but Paul had gotten used to how it had been before. After living alone with Jacob for such a long time, having Emma and Joey around was difficult. Privacy wasn't a possibility. Despite the size of the house, Paul had never felt so cramped.

He liked to think that he could handle it. Emma obviously could. She could handle anything as long as she thought she was in charge. Jacob was another story entirely. Paul saw the signs: food started to go missing from the fridge; wrappers were stuffed inside each other in the trash. Jacob was a stress eater. Well, no, that was not entirely fair, nor accurate. Jacob enjoyed food. He just happened to eat more when things were bothering him.

Paul didn't mention anything when he found three candy wrappers down the back of the couch. He threw them away and hoped Emma didn't notice the food missing from the cupboards.

Paul had noticed Jacob's relationship with food when they'd first started living together. He'd been the one buying groceries and most of the snacks had gone untouched for a while. Then, one night, the two of them had returned home from Sarah's much too drunk and Paul had kissed Jacob. There'd been a short moment when Paul had been worried that it wasn't going to be reciprocated but Jacob had kissed him back and they'd ended up in bed together.

The next morning, Paul had awoken to a cold bed and a withdrawn Jacob. Paul had initially laughed at his sudden gay crisis and Jacob's need to label everything but that night, Jacob had slept on the couch and, by morning, half of the kitchen had been cleared out.

They'd never spoken about it and Jacob's anxious binges had continued for a month until Sarah had come along and ruined it. She'd come over for dinner and had showed up early. Paul remembered the way that Jacob had been struggling to zip up his jeans and how it had made something hot unfurl in his stomach. It had only taken one sentence to kill it.

“Domestic bliss, huh?” Sarah had joked.

Jacob had flushed scarlet and had barely eaten a thing that night. The weight had disappeared almost as quickly as it had appeared and Paul hadn't expected to be so disappointed.

At the farmhouse, it didn't take long for Jacob to start gaining weight again. Paul wasn't sure he would have noticed it if he hadn't been looking for it, but he couldn't miss the way Jacob's face started to round out and how good his ass looked in his jeans. He didn't expect Emma to pick up on it, so he definitely didn't expect her to say anything.

“Jacob, you need to stop stuffing your face.”

It came out of nowhere, one afternoon.

“You're looking a little bloated.”

“Emma...” Paul interjected.

“What? It's not like I can just drive into town and go shopping for more food. Or new clothes, when he outgrows everything he owns.”

Jacob's eyes widened in surprise and a flush crept up his neck. He didn't say a word. Paul tried to think of a way to amicably break the silence but then Emma shook her head and smiled.

“You know I'm joking,” she said as if it was obvious. “But you do need to stay in shape. We all do.”

Jacob nodded once, stiffly, and then looked away. Paul felt like he should say something, anything, but he knew that Jacob hated it when they argued.

Paul started to worry about the little things after that. Jacob stopped finishing his meals and Emma praised him for it. Paul rarely saw him eat in the day but weight didn't drop off like before. Emma had made sure that the cupboards were full of treats to tempt Joey into behaving. Paul was sure that Jacob was compensating for skipping meals by binging at night.

 

 

 

The floorboards creaked too much in the farmhouse for Jacob's liking. Emma was a heavy sleeper but he still took a longer route downstairs at night, just in case. He tried to eat less and the way that she glared at him over dinner made that easy, but by nightfall, he was always starving. Some nights, he could fall asleep despite the hunger. Most of the time, though, he just laid awake until he gave in and found his way down to the kitchen.

There was always something to eat. They had a well stocked kitchen for wanted fugitives. Emma had told them that she didn't want Joey living like they were on the run, that it wasn't good for a child and that wasn't what Joe would want for him.

There were a small number of grocery stores in the vicinity of the farmhouse. They never visited the same one twice and they were always in disguise. Paul had been the last one to go and he'd gotten all of Jacob's favourite things. The cupboards were full of chips and cookies which made it even harder to resist a midnight snack.

He rummaged through the fridge and pulled out a leftover piece of cake. Emma had cut it in front of him at dinner and she'd looked at him as if daring him to ask for a slice. He stared at it just sitting there on the plate. He'd done so well to resist it the first time around and Emma had been so pleased with him. His stomach rumbled and made up his mind for him. Emma didn't have to know.

The first bite was heavenly. Jacob was so hungry that he was sure he'd happily eat anything but the cake was light and fluffy on his tongue. It was gone in less than a minute. He looked through the fridge again but there was nothing ready to eat so he poured himself a glass of milk instead.

In one of the cupboards he found a box of cookies. He placed a few onto the empty plate, adding some mini doughnuts after that. He made sure to not take too many; the last thing he needed was a lecture in the morning. There was a loaf of bread on the side. He felt a pang of hunger and looked at his plate. There were a lot of calories on it but he was hungry. He made himself a sandwich and sat down at the table. He tried to eat slowly, to draw it out. He demolished the sandwich first, relaxing a little when he started to feel sated.

Jacob moved onto the doughnuts after drinking half of his glass of milk. He saved the rest for his cookies. The doughnuts were covered in sugar, Delicious in a guilty sort of way. He started to get full around the third one and he knew he should call it a night. He could just put the last doughnut and the cookies back. Nobody would know and he really didn't need to eat any more but he wanted to.

Jacob picked up the first cookie and took a bite. It was soft in the middle with chocolate chips running through it. He dipped the remainder of it in his milk before eating it and finishing the last of the doughnuts. There were three cookies left and Jacob wasn't actually sure if he could finish them. He picked up the lightest one and bit into it. Oatmeal raisin. His favourite. He sat back in the chair and chewed happily, delighting in the subtle taste of cinnamon. As he swallowed, he could feel the cookie settling in his stomach. He slipped his hand down beneath the table and loosened his pyjama pants. His stomach felt bloated beneath his fingertips as he picked up another cookie.

The last two went down more easily than they should have. He was full, to the extent that he was starting to feel a little uncomfortable, but that didn't stop him.

When his plate and glass were both empty, Jacob staggered to his feet. He felt a little off balance, like he was being led by his full stomach as he walked slowly over to the sink. He quietly washed the plate and put it away. He felt heavy and tired as he wiped a few stray crumbs off of the table.

He turned to leave the kitchen but his mouth tasted off. The milk had left it tacky so he washed the glass up and filled it half way with water. He took a gulp and winced as he felt it cascade down into his stomach. He drained the glass.

It was by no means the most he had ever eaten but after a few days of barely eating at all, it felt like much more. Jacob sighed and looked down at himself. There were crumbs on his t shirt and around his mouth. He brushed them off as he walked back upstairs.

He didn't look bloated, not really, but it was hard to tell. His stomach definitely looked a little larger but he wasn't sure if that was just because he'd gained weight again. He held his breath as he approached the bed, sure that Emma would know where he'd been. He gingerly got into bed, making as little noise as possible. It was warm and he was sleepy. It didn't take him long to fall asleep with his stomach warm and full.

 

 


	2. Two

The worst thing about life in the farmhouse, besides having to watch Emma drape herself all over Jacob, was the crippling boredom. Being the third wheel was bad enough, without having nothing to distract himself with. It seemed like every time he turned a corner, the two of them were fucking or playing happy families with the kid. He saw the way Emma touched Jacob, the way her hands slid down his body and avoided the parts of him that had gotten a little soft. She'd tut or shake her head and then Paul's stomach would turn when he saw the shame on Jacob's face.

He spent a few days trying to keep himself busy but that wasn't easy. Their only real task was to keep Joey safe and happy. That was not Paul's area of expertise. He was frustrated. Emma joked about cabin fever but it wasn't far from the truth. It wouldn't be so bad if he could just go out.

So he did. He walked around for a while, feeling the chill of the night air and keeping off of busy streets. It was dark and nobody knew where they were so, really, there was minimal risk, but still. He wasn't stupid. He was just bored.

Getting Megan to leave the store with him was easy. He just had to make a joke or two and smile at her. A little bit of attention went a long way. She told him that she wouldn't sleep with him and that was fine. He had no interest in that. Everything was going perfectly but then he slipped. He showed her too much of him. She was scared.

She went down easily and Paul thought about killing her right there in the parking lot. He wanted to, but it was too risky and he didn't want to have to rush.

One thought of how Emma would react if he took her back to the farmhouse settled it. Once he managed to get her into the house unnoticed, tying her up was easy.

As expected, Emma didn't take to their new guest too kindly. At first, Paul was amused but Jacob was angry, too. It was hardly something to get so worked up over. They'd all killed before.

Well, no, no they hadn't, had they?

“You're going to have to kill her,” Emma told him. “We can't keep her here, not with Joey around.”

Jacob wouldn't even look at him. It was if they were strangers, as if they hadn't made a life together at all.

“No, I think Jacob should do it,” Paul snapped.

That got his attention. Jacob's eyes shot up at his words. Paul handed him the knife.

“You kill her, I'll make breakfast,” he said. “I'm thinking pancakes.”

“Paul, you brought her here, she's your problem,” Emma interjected.

Jacob's eyes were pleading with him. Whether it was to take the knife back or to keep his mouth shut, Paul didn't know. He just knew that he didn't feel like doing either.

“You don't get it,” he said quietly. “He's been lying to you.”

“What?” Emma asked.

“Jacob's never killed anyone,” Paul told her. “He's a liar.”

Paul walked away, unable to be in the same room as them for a second longer. He didn't even feel bad about leaving Jacob. The explanation had come easier than he'd expected.

It was probably for the best, anyway. Paul wasn't really in the mood to kill the girl any more and Jacob needed to get his first time over and done with. It was time he stopped pretending to be one of them and just got on with it.

Paul went to the kitchen and started to make breakfast. He found the syrup at the back of one of the cupboards. He got everything ready but he didn't start cooking straight away. He knew it would take him time and he didn't want the food to get cold. Instead, Paul started to reorganise the kitchen. The food had been shoved into the cupboards haphazardly and he hated not being able to find anything. He was nearly finished when he heard Emma shout.

“Paul!” she exclaimed. “She's getting away!”

He dropped the can he was holding onto the counter and set off running. He found Emma by the back door and saw Megan running away into the darkness. They gave chase.

They heard her running, heard the fear in her breathing. Emma looked at him and grinned. There was no way for her to escape. There were two of them and only one of her, with nobody else around. Her footsteps stopped and Megan was nowhere to be seen. She was hiding.

Paul heard a muffled whimper. He pointed to a tree, sure of her location. They walked towards it and she set off again but she was slow. They tackled her, landing hard in the mud. Paul felt the cold, dirty water seeping into his clothes as they grabbed her. She screamed as they hauled her back to the house.

Once she was tied up in the basement again, Paul headed upstairs to the bathroom. He was cold and filthy and he needed a shower. The water was already running when he got there, steam filling the air and Emma smiled at him, offering him her hand. He frowned at her, because, really? Was that all it took? Did she think that, just because they'd worked together to catch a girl, they were best friends now? No, of course she didn't.

“We both love him, Paul, I know that's hard on you. Come on, let's get you cleaned up,” she said. “Don't freak out, it's not like we're gonna get it on.”

The adrenaline was still coursing through him, cushioning the shock when she kissed him. She laughed, because it was all a joke to her, but Paul couldn't really see a reason not to kiss her back. When he eventually got under the shower, the water felt hot on his skin, the sudden change in temperature giving him goosebumps as the dirt ran off of him.

Jacob appeared in the doorway and the guilt on his face was quickly replaced with shock and confusion as his eyes moved from Emma to Paul. They reached out to him because he was why this was happening. It was all for him.

“We're not giving up on you.” they said.

Jacob leaned into their touch as they ran their hands over his body. It felt like it had been a lifetime since Paul had felt his skin under his fingertips and he revelled in the way Jacob fell back against him. He went slowly, pressing small, open mouthed kisses to his neck as his hands trailed down his hips and around to his middle. Paul tried not to focus on how soft Jacob had gotten there but his hands kept finding their way back to his stomach.

The three of them towelled off and made their way to bed, to the room that Emma had claimed for herself and Jacob. Paul was hesitant until she pulled him in with them. He pressed up against Jacob's back, sandwiching him between the both of them.

Jacob moaned, pressing back against him as Paul ran his hands down his sides. He shuddered at the feeling of his ass pushing against him, soft and pliant against his cock.

Paul heard Emma giggle before pressing her lips to Jacob's. There was no shutting her out, that wasn't how it was going to work. He pushed it down, ignored the anger that flared when he realised that it was all he was going to get. It would have to be enough. He slid his hand around Jacob's body, mapping out the changes as he traversed his torso. Jacob let out a breath when Paul's fingers slid down past the curve of his stomach. He was hard and Paul squeezed him gently. Emma's hands met Paul's but she didn't make him stop. She let him continue to stroke Jacob as she ran her fingers up his body and over his nipples. Jacob made moaned breathily and bucked into Paul's hand.

“Please,” he said to nobody in particular.

Emma grinned at Paul before pushing him back and away from Jacob so he could lie flat on his back. Paul moved up the bed, towards Jacob's head. His eyes were unfocused as Emma straddled him. Paul wasn't surprised in the slightest at the choice of position, he hadn't expected anything else from her. He captured Jacob's mouth in a deep kiss as Emma sank down onto him.

Paul focused his attention on Jacob's upper half. He ran his tongue over the spots that he knew Jacob liked: his nipples, the spot behind his neck, the dip in his collarbone. He was surprised when he felt Jacob's hands on him, pulling him up towards his face. He went with it, not sure what to expect. Emma looked just as surprised as Paul felt when Jacob guided his cock towards his mouth and locked eyes with him. There was no avoidance as Jacob, pupils blown and cheeks flushed, kept eye contact with Paul and slowly took him into his mouth. Paul bit back a groan as he watched Jacob's kiss swollen lips slide over his cock, his cheeks hollowing with each suck. He always did look his best with something in his mouth and Paul wasn't sure he'd last long.

Emma let out a breathy sigh as she moved on top of Jacob. Paul let his eyes trail down Jacob's body, staring at the way his stomach jiggled just a little as he thrust his hips upwards. It was enough to make him need to bite his lip to keep himself focused.

Jacob swallowed around him, throat convulsing deliciously and Paul gave in to instinct. He thrust forwards, feeling Jacob groan around him. He watched his cock disappear between his lips, watched the way Jacob's mouth worked and tongue flicked out against his skin. He couldn't look away.

Paul felt his face flush when he thought about it. He was close, all of a sudden and he knew why. He tried to hold back but it was no use. Jacob swallowed without hesitation when Paul came, collapsing forwards, chest heaving. Emma continued to fuck Jacob as he shuffled down on the bed. Jacob was panting beside Paul as he felt himself start to drift. He didn't try to stay awake.

Paul jolted awake a few hours later. Jacob was gone, the space between him and Emma cold with his absence. He started to wonder just what had awoken him in the first place but then he heard a noise from just outside the room. Paul listened intently to the slow, heavy footsteps in the hallway before Jacob walked back into the room. In the semi-darkness, he looked like he was sleepwalking. Paul watched him stagger over to the bed, exhaling slowly before crawling onto the bed and settling back between the two of them. Emma didn't stir as he got comfortable and it was clear that Jacob thought he was the only one awake. He startled a little as Paul slipped an arm under his head, pulling him closer and closing the gap between them. He wrapped his other arm around his waist, hoping to feel the softness of his stomach one last time before Jacob inevitably freaked out in the morning.

Jacob froze under his fingertips. His abdomen was far from soft. It was firm and distended. Jacob's stumbling in the dark made sense; he'd been downstairs, in the kitchen, gorging himself through his panic. His stomach felt huge and round in the dark and Paul wondered just how much food Jacob had crammed into it. He rubbed small circles into his skin, the way that he knew Jacob liked.

Jacob whimpered and Emma stirred next to them. They froze. When she didn't wake up, Paul shifted the arm under Jacob's head so he could press his hand across his mouth. When Paul started to stroke his swollen belly again, Jacob's noises were muffled. At any other time, Paul would have panicked as he grew hard against Jacob's back, worried that Jacob would laugh at him and call him crazy. As he let his fingers run over Jacob's taut skin, the need to continue was visceral and Paul was drunk on it. There was no resistance; Jacob melted back against him, relaxing as Paul tried to massage his pain away.

Again, Paul awoke to a cold spot beside him. It looked like it was going to become a thing. Jacob didn't speak to him all day. It wasn't like he was angry, just embarrassed but Paul felt his stomach sinking as the day progressed. He wouldn't even look at him as they sat at the table, waiting for Emma to serve them dinner that night. Paul wasn't sure if it was because of the sex or what had happened later, but either was likely.

Emma gave Joey his food first, then placed a plate of lasagne in front of Paul and put another down for herself.

When she sat down and picked up her fork, Jacob looked sad but not surprised.

“Is Jacob not eating with us?” Joey asked.

Emma smiled, shaking her head.

“He had his share last night,” she said, like it was something funny. “He's not hungry.”

Jacob's cheeks reddened and he looked down at his hands. Emma looked at him expectantly.

“You're excused, Jacob,” she said. “Maybe you should go for a run.”

 


	3. Three

The next morning, Paul awoke to the sounds of jovial yelling from outside. When he made it downstairs, he expected to see Emma and Jacob playing with Joey but the kid was nowhere to be seen.

Emma was standing close to the house, watching Jacob run laps around the perimeter of the yard.

“Come on, you've only been going for five minutes,” she shouted.

As Jacob came closer, Paul started to doubt her. He was a little out of shape, sure, but Paul didn't think that he'd be that sweaty and out of breath after only five minutes.

Paul went down to the basement. There was still something that needed taking care of.

Paul didn't savour it. He didn't drag it out. He didn't even let her scream. He just slit her throat, quick and easy. It wasn't a game, it was a chore. When he dragged Megan's body out into the woods, he kept walking until Emma's shouting faded into nothing.

He showered as soon as he got back to the house. He watched the mud and blood swirl together in the water as he washed the sweat out of his hair. He paused as he left the bathroom; his bedroom was closer but a lot of his things were in Jacob and Emma's room. The jeans he'd been wearing the day before were still in there and he didn't really want to break into another pair unnecessarily. He walked down the hall way and found Jacob sitting, shoulders hunched, on the bed. He wondered how long Emma had made him run for and when he had last eaten.

“Are you okay?” Paul asked.

He could feel Jacob's eyes on him as he walked around the room, gathering his clothes off of the floor. He looked away as soon as Paul turned around.

“Yeah, I'm fine,” Jacob said. “I'm fine.”

“You don't have to do what she says, you know,” Paul insisted. “She's not the boss of you.”

“She's right,” Jacob replied quietly. “I can't help Joe if I can't even run for five minutes.”

Paul sighed and sat down next to Jacob and put his hand on his shoulder. Jacob flinched away.

“What the hell?” he shouted

“What? I was just trying to be friendly.” Paul said.

“I'm not gay,” Jacob said flatly.

Paul sighed. He tried not to look hurt as Jacob's eyes searched his face. There was nothing he could do if Jacob didn't want his help.

Jacob left, not looking back. Paul tried not to get angry. He walked to the bedroom window and looked out across the yard and beyond. They were surrounded by trees but he could see a few houses beyond those. He heard voices from down the hall and he was going to ignore it. He really didn't need to get involved with any more drama but he could hear the tone in Jacob's voice. It was nervous, so different from how he'd just spoken to Paul.

“Do I have to?” he asked.

“Yes, Jacob, you do,” Emma said. “You brought this on yourself.”

Paul walked down the hallway until he found them. They were in the bathroom and Emma had Jacob standing next to the scales. Paul meant to walk on by, despite how much he wanted to see the reading. He was caught between not wanting to embarrass Jacob and the way he itched to measure every part of the changes to his body.

Emma made up his mind for him, though.

“Paul, come in here,” she said.

“Why?” he asked, pausing in the doorway.

“I might need a second opinion,” she said.

It was bullshit, they all knew it. It didn't even make any sense but Paul didn't fight it. He walked in, remembering how quick Jacob had been to dismiss him earlier. He glanced at the slight swell of his belly.

“On you step then,” Emma said coldly.

For a second, Paul wanted to urge him on, too, until he saw Jacob's face. He looked hurt, scared even, which quickly turned into acceptance and then humiliation. His cheeks reddened as he stepped onto the scale and Paul felt something nasty twist in his gut. He wanted to stop Emma, he wanted to kill her for what she was putting Jacob through. The scale beeped and the bright red numbers flashed. 182.

Paul's mouth went dry. He wanted to wrap a measuring tape around Jacob's middle, his thighs, his ass. He wanted to watch Jacob change and catalogue every inch. He looked at Jacob's face as he stepped off the scale. He wanted to get him away from Emma.

Paul found it hard to understand what Jacob saw in her. She was manipulative and cruel. Her only redeeming feature seemed to be that she was good with Joey. He'd never been good around kids and Jacob had always laughed about it when they had been living together.

When Joey asked if they could order pizza and Emma said no, Paul interrupted. Maybe he just needed to approach the situation from another side.

“How about we make some?” he asked. “I can show you how.”

It was perfect. If he could win Joey over, it was possible that Jacob would follow suit. On top of that, pizza was Jacob's favourite. Paul had never seen him resist it.

Emma agreed but she seemed suspicious. Paul got to work making the dough. It was simple enough but the sauce was harder. They didn't have a lot of raw ingredients so he had to improvise with some jarred pasta sauce. He spread it in a thick layer over the rolled out dough before moving everything to the table. It took a remarkable amount of his patience to sit back and watch Joey clumsily sprinkle the cheese before correcting it. They topped it with ham, bacon, mushrooms, onions and sausage. Manipulating a child into choosing ingredients that would appeal to someone else was hardly the worst thing that Paul had ever done.

Paul placed the finished pizza into the oven, opened the kitchen door and proceeded to clean up after himself. It only took five minutes for Jacob to appear in the doorway.

“You're cooking?” he asked.

Paul nodded as he started to wipe the flour off of the sides.

“Pizza?”

“Yeah, Joey wanted one so I showed him how.”

Jacob, quite understandably, raised an eyebrow at that.

“You made pizza. For Joey,” he stated.

“Well, more like with Joey, for everyone,” Paul corrected with a grin. “But yeah. I thought it was about time I made an effort. He is Joe's kid.”

 

 

 

Jacob's mouth watered as Paul started to cut the pizza. It was huge; he doubted anything larger would have fit in the oven. The slices were thin but the base was wide enough that one was probably enough to fill Joey up. Emma gave him two anyway and handed an empty plate each to Jacob and Paul. Jacob could feel her eyes on him as he reached into the middle of the table. He took one slice to Paul's three.

It was, surprisingly, really good. He'd expected mediocrity, considering the limited ingredients Paul had to work with, but he always had been a good cook. The toppings were perfect and Jacob suspected that Paul may have chosen them with him in mind. His stomach churned with guilt as he chewed; Paul had probably made this to cheer him up but he couldn't enjoy it properly. Food really wasn't what he needed.

He sat quietly as everyone else finished their pizza and tried not to stare at the fourteen slices left in the middle. Jacob wasn't too hungry but he was far from full. He'd been doing really well over the last few days. He'd been running and he hadn't been down to the kitchen at night. He might have even lost a little weight, so he was angry, if anything. He was angry at Paul for making pizza when he knew what he was trying to do, but mostly, Jacob was angry at himself for having such poor willpower that it even mattered. The pizza smelled so good and he knew that Paul couldn't have meant anything by it but it was so tempting.

Jacob was still thinking about the pizza when he got into bed that night. The only thing he liked more than pizza was cold pizza. It was still in the fridge and he doubted anyone else had counted the slices like he had.

He felt Paul's arms slide around him as he settled into the bed and leant back into him without thinking. He was warm and solid behind him and Emma was already asleep. It was nice just feeling someone touch him, really. Nothing more. It didn't have to be anything more than that.

Jacob tried to sleep. He closed his eyes and stayed still for almost an hour but he just couldn't. Slowly, Jacob extricated himself from Paul's grip and crawled down to the edge of the bed. He saw Paul stir in the darkness but Jacob told him he'd be right back. He told him to go back to sleep.

The hard wood floor was cold on the soles of his feet but he didn't dare put shoes on. He crept down to the kitchen, jumping at every sound. He just wanted one slice. The pizza was sitting on the top shelf of the fridge, waiting for him. Jacob didn't bother with a plate. That would only mean washing up and possibly making too much noise, so he took the thinnest piece he could reach out of the fridge, closed the door and sat down. He had to make it last, make it count, so he took a small bite and tried to savour the taste. The cold cheese was amazing; it had hardened to perfection and he could taste everything so much more now that it wasn't burning his tongue. He ate slowly until he bit into a particularly good bit of ham. After the slice was gone, Jacob felt guilty. He wished he could have made it last longer. He was still hungry.

Jacob poured himself a glass of soda, hoping to fill himself up a little. He wouldn't be able to sleep with his stomach growling, not when he could feel it resonating through his body. He slid a hand down his torso and felt his softened abdomen swelling out over his pyjama pants. It wasn't huge but he could get a handful of belly if he gripped hard enough. He tried to hold onto that thought and why he was doing this. He needed to remember why he couldn't just have another slice.

It would only be three, then. The same amount that Paul had eaten. It wasn't that bad, it wasn't excessive. He stood up and hesitated, gulping down the soda, trying to trick himself into thinking he was full. He could feel the liquid sloshing around in his almost empty stomach. It wasn't enough. He poured himself another glass and looked at the pizza in the fridge again. There was more than enough left that nobody would notice another slice going missing.

Jacob took two back to the table with him. He ate more slowly than he had with the first slice, having already tasted everything. He ate just to feel it in his mouth, more than anything. He chewed slowly and enjoyed just being able to eat what he wanted to. He gulped down his soda when he was finished, wiping his mouth and standing up to leave. He'd had enough, he didn't need to overdo it.

Jacob jumped when he heard a floorboard creak. He spun around and saw Paul standing in the doorway.

“Couldn't sleep either?” Paul asked.

Jacob shook his head, feeling his heart thump in his chest. How long had he been there? How much had he seen?

“Want a refill?”

Paul reached out for Jacob's glass before pouring one of his own.

“Is Emma still asleep?” Jacob asked.

“Yeah, nothing wakes her,” Paul said. “Hey... you want some pizza? There must be some left.”

Jacob bit his lip. Paul was already loading two plates with what was left of the pizza. He wanted to say no, to tell him that he'd already had more than enough but then he'd have to admit to eating it in the first place. Paul put four slices down in front of him and sat down across the table.

“Thanks,” Jacob said quietly.

It wasn't like he didn't want it. He just knew he shouldn't.

“You barely ate anything at dinner,” Paul said, making Jacob feel guilty. “I thought pizza was your favourite.”

“I wasn't that hungry earlier,” Jacob lied.

Paul smiled warmly.

“So you are now?”

Jacob didn't want to disappoint him. He nodded and picked up a slice that was double the size of any he'd had so far. He bit into it and it didn't taste any less fantastic than the ones before it. Paul grinned at him when he took another bite.

“It's really good,” Jacob said after he swallowed. “Seriously, you made the dough from scratch?”

“Yeah, it's like the one thing I can make without a recipe,” Paul said.

Jacob didn't say anything after that. He ate in silence, trying to resist his glass of soda. His mouth was sticky with sauce, making him thirsty but he knew if he drank too much, he wouldn't be able to finish his pizza and Paul would get suspicious. Paul knew him. He'd seen him eat too many times to think that four slices of pizza would fill him up.

After the second, Jacob started to feel full. He decided to pick up the largest one next. If he ate that first, he'd have less to go after. That seemed logical. It was covered in toppings and cheese. Jacob was surprised that Paul had let him have it. They'd always fought over the best slices when they'd ordered pizza before.

He'd been making an effort, though, that much was clear. Jacob wasn't sure how he felt about that; Paul obviously wanted something from him and he wasn't sure he could give him it but there was something comforting about having him around. He was safe, familiar and he hadn't even said anything about Jacob's weight. He'd expected him to mock him, at least when they'd argued but Paul had never been like that. Even when they fought, he'd never made it personal and that was something that Jacob appreciated.

Finally, he managed to get down to the last slice of pizza. He couldn't resist his glass any longer, though, so Jacob slowly sipped at his soda. He stopped when he felt it settle in his stomach, bloating him out slowly. He winced a little at the sensation and hoped that Paul didn't notice. He felt too full and, really, it was karma. It was his fault, it was what he deserved for sneaking down in the middle of the night to gorge himself.

He could have just given the last slice to Paul. He should have, but the pizza still looked good and there was a particularly crispy bit of bacon that he just had to taste. He raised it to his mouth slowly and took a large bite. Paul smiled at him from across the table and Jacob felt something other than fullness in the pit of his stomach.

Jacob couldn't help letting out a sigh when he was finished.

“Full?” Paul asked with a grin.

Jacob nodded and took a deep breath. He regretted it when his lungs expanded, pressing against his stomach. He felt sleepy but he didn't want to move. He couldn't hold back a yawn as he stretched in the chair.

 

 

 

“We should get back to bed before anyone notices,” Paul said.

Jacob's eyes were heavily lidded and he looked a little dopey. He had obviously kept eating way after he was full. As soon as he'd looked in the fridge, Paul had known that Jacob had already helped himself to some pizza. He'd expected Jacob to say no when he'd offered him more but he'd pushed it anyway.

“Yeah...” Jacob answered. “Yeah, we should.”

He grimaced and made to stand up but Paul shook his head.

“Stay there, I'll clean up,” he said.

Jacob smiled gratefully as Paul got up from the table and quietly took their plates and glasses over to the sink. He washed them, careful not to clink anything together. By the time he got back to the table, Jacob's eyes were half closed. He grunted as Paul helped him to his feet.

Paul kept his eyes trained on the door and away from the way that Jacob's shirt was clinging tightly to his overstuffed abdomen. A shudder ran through him with every small whimper that Jacob made as they walked upstairs.

As they crawled into bed, careful not to wake Emma, Paul told himself that he was just happy to see Jacob eating again and doing something other than what Emma told him to. He tried to ignore the way Jacob looked so off balance as he shuffled in behind him.

Jacob didn't move away when Paul crawled flush up against his back. He sighed softly, pressing back into his chest and Paul wrapped his arms around him. He was careful to keep his touches light around his stomach as he pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder. Jacob needed to know that everything was okay.

In the morning, Jacob mouthed him a _thank you_ when Paul took the blame for the disappearance of the pizza.

“Yeah, I really pigged out,” Paul said as Emma raised a sceptical eyebrow. “I can still feel it.”

He patted his stomach for emphasis and he saw Jacob's face redden over her shoulder at his words. He probably could still feel it, Paul thought with a smile.

 


	4. Four

Jacob caught Paul staring at him a few times over the next day or two. He always looked away as soon as Jacob noticed but it was obvious where he was looking. Jacob wondered if Emma had finally managed to get Paul to agree with her or if he was just as disgusted as she was by his recent weight gain because he didn’t seem to be able to stop looking at his stomach. Jacob was a little disappointed because, although he did need to get it under control, it had been nice when he'd thought Paul didn't mind. Not only that, but it was at least partially his fault. He couldn't just encourage him to eat and not exercise and then look at him like that when he gained weight. What did he expect?

Emma had stopped showering with him. She still touched him, but she'd only fuck him with the lights off and Jacob didn't blame her. It was his fault, really. He looked at himself in the mirror as he took his clothes off in the bathroom. His jeans were starting to cut into his waist and he could see them pinching at his skin. He finished disrobing and turned away from the mirror. There was a knock at the door.

“Room for one more?” Paul asked.

The door didn't open. Jacob wasn't sure if he wanted to say yes or no. There was something to the fact that Paul wanted to shower with him, that he wanted to be close to him when Emma didn't but Jacob felt exposed, naked, in the cold light of day.

He opened the door.

Paul grinned at him as he pulled his t shirt over his head. Jacob got into the shower and shuffled along, hiding himself behind the curtain. His heart beat a little faster as Paul's eyes swept over his body when he joined him.

Jacob didn't know what to expect. The last time they had been in the shower together, it had lead to a lot more than washing his hair. His skin flushed when he thought about what he'd done that night.

“You okay with this?” Paul asked.

Jacob nodded. He was. He really was. Paul stepped towards him, his feet squeaking on the wet ceramic tub. He leaned in and Jacob licked his lips but Paul pulled away again just as quickly. He shook his head and motioned for Jacob to turn around. He faced the wall, waiting for Paul to move. He heard the pop of a bottle cap and tensed, not expecting to feel fingers in his hair. The shampoo foamed into a soft lather and Jacob laughed.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“People tend to wash in the shower,” Paul answered matter of factly. “What did you think I was going to do?”

Jacob flushed in embarrassment. He'd expected a lot of things, but not that. He'd thought Paul was just being persistent.

“I don't know,” he lied.

He shuddered as Paul's nails raked bluntly against his scalp. The water washed the suds out of his hair as Paul's hands began a slow journey downwards. There was the click of a cap and the sound of liquid being expelled from a bottle. Jacob tensed immediately and Paul huffed a small laugh as he began to rub liberal amounts of shower gel into his back and shoulders.

Jacob didn't know if he should put a stop to whatever was happening. Paul seemed content just to wash him but Jacob wasn't sure if it was for the best. He bit his lip as Paul's fingers moved back up, deftly pressing into the knots of his shoulders and skimming against the tender skin of his neck. He had to know how sensitive it was because he laughed and let his nails trail down, making goosebumps break out across Jacob's chest.

Jacob froze when Paul stepped closer to him and moved his hands around his ribcage and continued south.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“We've been over this,” Paul replied, pushing his hands down further.

The shower gel made everything slippery and Paul's hands slid over his stomach with ease. Jacob felt his face heating up and he wanted to run. Paul was past dangerous territory. His fingers were pressing into Jacob's belly, squeezing gently every now and then. Jacob waited for the disappointed tuts and sighs but they didn't come.

Instead, Jacob felt Paul hardening against his back and his breath hitched in his throat. He centered in on the sensations: rough palms against the softness of his skin; Paul's chest heaving with ragged breaths against his shoulders.

Paul's fingers spanned his abdomen and he felt his chest flushing. He was embarrassed, he wanted to get out but he was feeling something different. He was rooted to the spot, aching to press back against Paul and he had to bite his lip to keep in a groan when one of Paul's hands moved lower.

With one hand wrapping around his cock and the other palming at the curve of his belly, Jacob grew hard in moments. He squeezed his eyes shut, unable to stop himself from thrusting into Paul's hand.

Paul mouthed at his shoulder, stroking him quickly, his own breaths just as quick as Jacob's. There was a slickness against his back, entirely different from the water cascading down their bodies as Paul rutted against him. The tiled walls magnified each sound, reflecting their sighs and gasps back at them. Jacob was lost in it. He half hated it, unable to escape what he needed. He half loved it, too. The feeling of Paul holding him up, touching all of him, wanting him. Accepting him.

Jacob felt his knees buckle when he came but Paul caught him. He turned him around with ease, letting Jacob rest his head against his shoulder as his head spun. Jacob wasn't aware of Paul's hand moving to his own cock or how Paul kept supporting him even as he reached his own climax. He didn't pay much attention to being wiped clean. He didn't come out of his own head until the water was turned off and the spell was broken.

He came back to himself slowly, no longer enveloped in a sweltering heat from both the water and his blood pumping furiously under his skin. He head spun slightly as he looked up. Paul grinned at him tentatively, his hair sticking to his head as rivulets of water ran down his face. Jacob didn't know what to say or what to think. He kissed Paul hard, to thank him and because he wanted to.

They didn't speak as they dried off but there were gentle smiles and a brush of skin before they went back to separate bedrooms.

 

 

 

Emma knew. At first, Jacob wondered how but then he saw the marks on his shoulders and felt them on his neck. She didn't say anything, just laughed and smiled at him, but the smile was tight and the laughter was too jovial. It had been her idea, though, hadn't it? She had been there when it was the three of them. She had invited Paul into their bed. He didn't understand.

Jacob could still feel Paul's hands on him that night in bed. He found his hands drifting down to his stomach. Paul didn't seem to mind the weight he'd gained. Jacob could barely believe it but he felt a swelling in his chest when he thought about it. Paul didn't expect him to be perfect.

He noticed small things after that. He was used to catching Paul looking at him but he hadn't seen the way his eyes swept down his body and lingered on all of the places that Emma refused to acknowledge. Acceptance was one thing, but Paul seemed to really want him. Jacob could see it in his eyes. On the other hand, Emma wouldn't even touch his body. There were other things, too. Paul and Emma had taken glaring at each other to another level when he thought he wasn't looking. It didn't help that Paul went out of his way to oppose her, especially when she was being controlling.

Emma cornered him upstairs and Jacob wasn't sure what to expect until he followed her line of sight into the bathroom. The scales were against the wall. Emma walked into the bathroom after him and Jacob didn't say a word. He just wanted to get it over with. He didn't want anyone else to see.

“Paul?” Emma shouted and Jacob felt sick. “Could you come up here?”

“Why?” Jacob asked. “Why are you doing this?”

“I just think this is something he deserves to see,” Emma said.

Jacob heard footsteps on the stairs and then Paul was in the doorway. Jacob met his eyes, saw the look of surprise on his face. Paul might not mind the fact that he'd gained some weight but Jacob doubted he'd feel the same after seeing those numbers. It was math.

He stepped onto the scales and stared at the wall in front of him. He didn't want to look at Paul or the scales.

Emma breathed in dramatically when the scales beeped. He obviously hadn't lost anything but he refused to look at her. Paul was frozen in the doorway, eyes glued to the display. He blinked and looked up at Jacob, face blank. Jacob tried to calm down but his eyes were stinging and he could feel his throat tensing up. After a few seconds, Paul spoke.

“This is stupid,” he said to Emma. “Why am I here? Why are you doing this?”

“Don't you care about Jacob's health?” she asked.

“Of course I do,” he said. “This has nothing to do with it, he's fine.”

Jacob stepped off of the scales and pushed past Paul. He didn't want to be around anyone. He appreciated what Paul had said, he really did, but he didn't know what to say. He definitely didn't want to hear Emma talking about him like he wasn't there.

After dinner, Jacob was washing up the dishes when a snap, like the crack of a whip, broke the silence. He spun around, suds dripping from his hands to see Paul grinning mischievously and spinning a tea towel. He snapped it again but Jacob dodged, laughing. He scooped up a handful of suds and slung it in Paul's direction, hitting him square in the chest. Paul looked down at the wetness seeping into the fabric of his shirt. He looked back at Jacob, his face turning stormy and Jacob froze.

“What do you think you're doing?” he asked.

“I...” Jacob started but then Paul started cackling madly.

“Oh my god, your face,” Paul said.

He cracked the towel a third time, catching Jacob across one thigh. His grin became something warmer, turning into a gentle smile and he stepped closer, dropping the towel onto the floor.

Jacob held his breath, waiting for him to make another move but they were interrupted by Emma clearing her throat.

“That towel is going to need washing now,” she said. “You can't just drop things on the floor, Paul. I don't know how you did things when you two were living together, but that's just disgusting.”

Paul rolled his eyes and gave Jacob a small smile before he picked up the towel and walked down to the basement to put it in the laundry. Emma walked out without so much as a glare at Jacob, leaving him to finish the dishes. She didn't speak to him when he got into bed that night but he knew she was awake.

The tension stayed thick in the air and her decent into sleep didn't help at all. He lay awake, trying to get comfortable. His stomach rumbled softly in the darkness. He hadn't eaten enough at dinner but he'd thought that he'd drank enough water to trick his body. He still needed to lose a few pounds. Not that he had lost any to begin with. His weight had plateaued since Emma had convinced, no, inspired, him to start exercising more but the diet was harder. He knew, though, that eating too little was just as bad for weight loss and that a lack of sleep was never good. That's what he kept telling himself as he made his way down to the kitchen.

He just needed to eat something small, just enough to let him get to sleep. The fridge was almost bare. He pulled out a can of soda and closed the door, moving to the cupboards instead. Those were much more promising. There were snacks that he felt guilty for even looking at. One thing caught his eye.

Paul had never bought peanut butter when they'd been living together. He hated the stuff and refused to have it in the house. He'd said that just seeing a knife covered in it in the sink was enough to turn his stomach. Jacob had never argued with him about it, it wasn't that big of a deal but he hadn't eaten peanut butter in much too long.

He grabbed the jar and some bread and set about making himself a sandwich. He ate slowly, feeling guilty even as he chewed; if he was going to do something he was going to berate himself for, he was damn well going to draw it out. He thought about Emma and how hard she'd worked with him, trying to help him lose the weight he'd gained.

Jacob put down the sandwich.

It seemed like a waste but he could just stop. He didn't have to eat it. He just really, really wanted to. The idea of throwing it in the bin after only two bites seemed so wrong. He knew one sandwich couldn't hurt, but it was the idea itself that was troubling him. He had tried so hard to resist snacking, but he couldn't, apparently.

Jacob's stomach rumbled again. He was hungry. He wasn't just eating because he wanted to. He shook his head, trying to get his head straight. It was like he was having an argument with himself. As if he didn't have enough people to do that with already.

He thought of Emma again but then he thought of Paul instead. He thought of the way he smiled when he looked at him, about the way his hands roamed freely over his body, not avoiding his stomach. He thought of how he had tried to get him to eat more at dinner and how worried he had looked when Jacob had refused.

He understood, because he wished he didn't have to be so useless with food. He wished he was able to just eat when and what he wanted, like Paul seemed to be able to do. More than that, though, he wished he could just relax about it. Paul didn't seem to mind how he was at all.

He finished the sandwich before he went to bed.

 

 


	5. Five

It took Emma a day to calm down after she caught Paul and Jacob having fun in the kitchen. That was all it was, Paul thought to himself. They were having fun and she didn't like it. Once she got over it, though, it was like the whole thing had never happened. Emma was all smiles and laughter, which worried Paul more than any glare or scowl.

 

He knew exactly what it meant when she smiled at him sweetly and invited him into their bedroom a night later. Jacob obviously didn't, judging by the looked on his face. Paul hesitated at the doorway but it was clear that Emma wasn't going to let it drop. She needed to control the two of them. Paul was happy to play along. Jacob didn't flinch away from his touch any more. He just needed to give him time.

 

They fell asleep with Jacob between them.

 

Paul woke up to find that Emma was back to her old tricks. The bed was empty and cold. He walked downstairs to find Emma reading to Joey.

 

“Where's Jacob?” he asked.

 

Emma looked up at him and smiled.

 

“Good morning, sleepyhead,” she said. “He’s in the garden.”

 

Paul glared at her. He walked outside and grimaced at the sight of Jacob running around the perimeter of the grass. He had one hand at his side, no doubt clutching a stitch. From the distance, Paul couldn't hear his breathing, but he could see how flushed his cheeks were. He started to walk towards him, to make him stop, but he knew that would do no good. The last thing they needed was an argument over exercise regimes. He could see his shirt clinging to his sweat-slicked back, showing off the curves that had found their way there. It took a lot for Paul to turn back around and walk back into the house. Jacob deserved better.

 

He kept himself busy for the rest of the day. He watched the news to keep informed of the investigation and Joe's whereabouts; he did a load of washing and then offered to go out for supplies. He heard the shower running before he went out. Jacob couldn't have been outside for more than a few hours. He tried to twist that into something that could make him feel better.

 

Paul walked around a little, keeping his hat low over his face. He got close to a store then had to double back; it was the place he'd taken Megan from. Instead, he walked for another half hour, until he found a small gas station. They didn't need much. He got the essentials first: washing powder, bread, milk, and eggs, and he was happy to see that the store sold Jacob's favourite soda. He picked up a few bags of chips and some things they could just throw in the freezer. He walked past the frozen section to get to the cash register and froze.

 

There was a stand-alone freezer adorned with Ben and Jerry's logos. It was half empty and they only had three flavours, but ice cream could always cheer Jacob up. Cherry Garcia was a big no, Paul remembered that, so he just grabbed a pint each of the other two, hoping Jacob would like at least one of them. When the cashier bagged everything up, Paul hid the ice cream under the bread, just in case. He walked quickly back to the house, legs burning with exertion. He didn't care about the burgers defrosting, but refrozen ice cream was just wrong.

 

Everyone was upstairs when he got home. He was thankful as he hid the Ben and Jerry's behind one of the loaves of bread in the freezer. He half-expected Jacob to be absent at dinner, but he was pleased to see him walk into the kitchen. His steps were careful and deliberate, and he looked exhausted but his small smile looked easy and painless. Paul wanted to help him to his seat, but Jacob looked determined. If Paul's eyes snapped to the way his t shirt hugged his stomach instead of the way Jacob's face tightened when he lowered himself into his chair, he couldn’t be blamed.

 

Dinner was lasagne and salad. In Jacob's case, it was almost entirely salad, but at least he was allowed to eat. That was progress, at least. It didn't stop Paul from objecting when Jacob offered to do the dishes.

 

“No, I'll do them,” Paul interjected. “You go rest up, you looked tired.”

 

Jacob blushed and Emma looked furious. Well, Paul wasn't going to play along.

 

“I couldn’t let you do that,” Jacob said, as if it was a huge job. “I'll help you.”

 

Emma's eyes narrowed at that.

 

“No, Jacob, Paul's right,” she said. “Go.”

 

Paul watched Jacob and Emma leave with Joey in tow. He smiled to himself as he placed the dishes into the sink.

 

Paul decided to join Emma and Jacob in bed again that night. He smirked at Emma when he got into bed and Jacob made a pleased noise, turning towards him. Paul wrapped his arms around him, ignoring the way Emma moved closer. He let his arm drift down to Jacob's stomach, fingers gently touching the soft skin. It gave a little too much for Paul's liking, especially so soon after dinner. He'd be surprised if Jacob managed to sleep through the night. He was sure he must be hungry.

 

Emma interrupted his thoughts when she leaned over Jacob to kiss him, all tongue and breathy noises. Her hands clamped around his face, turning him back towards her. Jacob went with her but his hand stayed intertwined with Paul's.

 

Paul forced himself to stay awake after they separated. He was sure Jacob wasn't asleep, despite the low, deep breaths he was taking. He was just about to give up when he felt Jacob stir beside him. Paul waited for him to get up and leave the room, scared of what interrupting him would do.

 

He walked slowly, allowing Jacob time to get started. He wanted to catch him in the act. Jacob was leaning against the kitchen table when reached the door. He didn't spot him at first, too focused on cramming chips into his mouth. Paul couldn’t help the smile that broke across his face; Jacob looked more relaxed than he'd seen him in days. He cleared his throat and his smile faded when he saw Jacob tense up. He wanted to reassure him, but acknowledgement would only make it worse.

 

“Looks like I wasn't the only one who felt like a late-night snack,” Paul said when Jacob turned to looked at him. “Don't worry, I won’t tell her.”

 

Jacob looked away, a flush colouring his cheeks.

 

“Hey,” Paul tried again. “I don't know what you expected, of course you're going to be hungry after all of the exercise you did today. You're practically running on empty.”

 

He walked to the cupboards and found some bread. He made a crude sandwich, nothing more than a slice of cheese, but Jacob relaxed when he wasn't the only one with food in his hands.

 

“If I promise not to tell Emma, will you keep a secret for me?” he asked.

 

Jacob frowned, curious, and nodded.

 

“What? You got another girl in the basement?”

 

Paul laughed, maybe a little too loudly, and shook his head.

 

“No, but you know when I went out for supplies?”

 

“Yeah?”

“I might have gone off the list.”

 

Jacob grinned as Paul opened the fridge to show him the soda.

 

“Yeah, I know, I saw,” he said quietly. “Thanks.”

 

Paul nodded and waited a few moments, watching Jacob finish off the chips before opening the freezer.

 

“I was worried about you today. You were pushing yourself really hard,” he said.

 

Jacob shrugged, but Paul knew he wasn't out there running for himself. He knew it wasn't what he wanted.

 

“I thought you deserved something nice.”

 

Jacob's eyes lit up when he saw the two containers of Ben and Jerry's. There was no more hesitation and Paul wasn't surprised. He knew how Jacob felt about ice cream. Jacob dropped the empty bag of chips on the table and started forward, making a grab for them, but then he froze. His face turned from elated to furious in an instant.

 

“Is this some sick joke to you?” he asked, voice cold.

 

Paul's heart pounded in his chest. He really hoped Jacob didn't think that. He hoped Emma's tendrils of manipulation hadn't sunk so deep that Jacob would act like that.

 

“What? No!” Paul said.

 

“Oh, what, so they'd run out of every other flavour, had they?” Jacob asked.

 

His speech was more of a stutter, anger and anxiety pouring out of him in equal measure. His eyes were hurt.

 

Paul looked down at the two pints of ice cream that he was holding. He hadn't even really looked at the names but he couldn't believe that something like that would matter. He still should have noticed.

 

The first was Chunky Monkey, which he knew for a fact was Jacob's favourite. The other pint was Chubby Hubby. He couldn't remember buying it before but he almost laughed at the connotations.

 

“No,” he said quietly. “No, they had Cherry Garcia but I know you can't eat that since you got sick at Sarah's party.”

 

Jacob's glare faltered at the mention of that. His face softened as he looked at Paul, a trace of disbelief still evident.

 

“Honestly, I didn't even think ... You're not even chubby, Jesus Christ. You're fine. Emma's just crazy, you know that.”

 

“Yeah, she's a little crazy,” Jacob agreed. “Pretty sure we all are, though.”

 

He laughed and Paul felt the tension snap.

 

“You want some, then?” Paul asked, reaching towards the cutlery drawer.

 

“A little couldn't hurt, right?” Jacob asked.

 

Paul pulled two spoons out of the drawer and held both containers out to Jacob. He looked indecisive for a moment, before reaching out and picking Chubby Hubby.

“That's a surprise,” Paul mused. “I thought Chunky Monkey was your favourite.”

 

“It is,” Jacob said. “I just like to save the best for last. If I don't like this one, I at least have that left, right?”

 

They sat down, Paul pulling his chair close to Jacob's so they could both dig their spoons into the ice cream. It was hard from the freezer, but they managed. Paul took just enough to taste it each time; just enough that Jacob would keep on eating.

 

They talked sporadically: about Joe and the plan; about their old life and their old jobs; about their future.

 

“I kind of miss it, you know,” Jacob told him as he finished a mouthful of ice cream. “You know, the kids were great. I miss being a teacher.”

 

Paul smiled. Jacob had been great at his job. He'd get thank-you cards from children and parents, even his colleagues on occasion. It had highlighted everything about Jacob that Paul loved and every way in which they were different.

 

“You were good at it,” Paul told him. “I don't miss my job at all.”

 

Jacob snorted.

 

“No surprises there.”

 

Before Paul knew it, there was a scraping sound as Jacob's spoon hit the bottom of the pot. He looked mildly surprised, before he loaded what was left onto his spoon.

 

“You want it?” he asked.

 

“Nah.”

 

“Good,” Jacob said, grinning.

 

Paul inhaled deeply as he watched Jacob lick the spoon clean.

  


 

  


Jacob put the empty ice cream container down on the table. He thought of Emma, asleep upstairs and was surprised when guilt didn't join the warm, full feeling in his stomach. Instead, he focused on the way Paul was looking at him, the easy smile and acceptance in his eyes.

 

“So, I guess you like that flavour?” Paul asked.

 

Jacob nodded.

 

“Yeah, it was good, but I probably shouldn't have eaten the whole thing.”

 

Paul rolled his eyes.

 

“I had some too,” he said.

 

It was pretty much a lie. Paul had had a few spoonfuls at most, but Jacob appreciated the attempt. He hadn't even tried to stop himself from eating the ice cream; it had been so long since he'd had any and it had been just what he'd needed.

 

“Wait, this has banana ice cream in it?” Paul asked, looking at the other tub.

 

“What?” Jacob asked. “Are you serious?”

 

“What?”

 

“Please tell me you're joking. You haven't tried Chunky Monkey?”

 

“No?”

 

“Are you just manipulating me into opening it so you can have some?” Jacob asked.

 

Paul grinned. Jacob looked at the clock. It was late. They really need to be getting to bed, and he said so.

 

“You realise you can reseal ice cream, right?” Paul asked sarcastically. “Like, it does keep.”

 

Jacob sighed and reached for the tub. He knew he wasn't going to get out of it without a fight and, besides, it was his favourite flavour. The condensation made his fingers slip as he pulled the lid off. Paul laughed at him, leaning easily against his shoulder. His body was warm against Jacob's side and the sudden contact distracted him from the food in his hand.

 

Paul looked pointedly down at his lips and then back to his face, a warning, Jacob knew. He didn't move, just let Paul lean in and kiss him, strong hands wrapping around his body. Jacob had to bite down on his lip to stop himself from laughing and protesting as Paul scooped him out of his chair and into his lap.

 

“Jesus, Paul,” Jacob said.

 

“What?” Paul asked.

 

“You're ridiculous.”

 

Jacob leaned back into his body, shuddering when Paul pressed a kiss to his neck. Jacob was about to tell him to stop because they really shouldn't, just in case they woke anybody up, but Paul didn't go further than that. He reached around Jacob to grab the open container of ice cream and the spoon that he'd been using.

 

“What are you doing?” Jacob asked him.

 

Paul didn't answer. He dug the spoon into the softened dessert, and Jacob was about to object to Paul taking the first bite but then Paul held the spoon up to his mouth, waiting for him to accept it. Jacob wasn't sure which part of it was weirder, the fact that he was sitting in Paul's lap or that he was feeding him like a child. Or maybe that he wasn't sure how much Paul thought he was going to eat.

 

He parted his lips, letting the spoon into his mouth and groaned when the ice cream hits his tongue.

 

“Oh, man, this is good,” he breathed.

 

It really was; the chunks of fudge went perfectly with the flavour of the ice cream. Paul reloaded the spoon and moved it back to Jacob's mouth. He took it slowly, letting his free hand drift lazily down his side. The comforting motions made Jacob feel sleepy as he kept letting Paul feed him. The ice cream was sweet and thick as it slid down his throat. He whined as Paul kissed the back of his neck again, shifting in his lap. He'd eaten too much and his stomach was starting to protest.

 

“Paul...” he said quietly. “I... uh...”

 

His voice got lost as he felt Paul's teeth press against his skin and another spoonful was eased into his mouth. Jacob shuddered, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck stand up as his face flushed.

 

“I've had enough,” he managed to get out. “Too much, really.”

 

“You sure?” Paul asked.

 

He hesitated with the spoon as he ran his other hand around Jacob's middle. He rubbed slow circles into his stomach, easing the ache that was beginning to become more prominent with each mouthful. Jacob sighed, leaning back into Paul's chest and letting himself relax, despite every part of him telling him to stop. Paul's fingers worked their way under his shirt, pressing into the firm flesh of his belly. Jacob tried to suck it in, but he was too full for that.

 

Nails ran against his skin and Jacob bit back a gasp. He squeezed his eyes shut as he felt his cock twitch in his jeans and told himself it was from the way Paul's lips were still pressed against his neck.

 

Paul dug the spoon into the ice cream again, raising it slowly to Jacob's mouth. He stopped an inch away and Jacob appreciated the choice. Paul's fingers pressed into his stomach gently, easing the discomfort. Jacob could tell from how little it gave that his belly was taut, but he accepted the spoon anyway.

 

Guilt bubbled up inside of him, prickled just under his skin, coiled around the lust thrumming through him. He thought of all the progress he'd been making, or at least been trying to make. Then Paul had ruined it.

 

“Well done,” he whispered into his ear.

 

Jacob tensed, because what did that even mean? Well done for eating beyond his needs? He was pretty sure that was not something that should have been congratulated.

 

“Huh?” he asked.

 

Paul smiled against his skin and he waited until Jacob had another spoonful of ice cream in his mouth before answering.

 

“Well done,” he repeated. “For doing what you want to do.”

 

Jacob swallowed and tried to come up with a reply. He couldn't. He wanted to tell Paul that he shouldn't keep eating, because that's what he felt deep in his core. That would just prove Paul's point, though. It wouldn't have been criminal for anyone else to eat two pints of ice cream. Sure, it would have been a little unhealthy, but nobody would have stopped them.

 

Paul must have sensed his hesitation and self-doubt. He stopped rubbing circles into his skin, just letting his thumb stroke him gently.

 

“If you finished this, really, what harm would it do?” he asked.

 

Jacob didn't answer straight away because he knew what he was trying to say. He knew he was right. There was just some part of him that didn't want to see Emma's face when she found out he hadn't lost any weight.

 

“Well, I'd probably need help getting back to bed,” Jacob said instead.

 

He laughed but he felt Paul tense against him.

 

“Do you want any more?” Paul asked, his voice strained.

 

“Yeah,” Jacob replied honestly. “I just... I'm really full.”

 

“Go on,” Paul insisted, raising the spoon to his mouth again. “For me.”

 

“Why?” Jacob asked. “Why do you want that?”

 

Paul paused.

 

“I just want to see you happy.”

 

It was a lie, Jacob knew it. He could feel Paul's erection digging into his ass but he said nothing. He opened his mouth and let Paul keep feeding him. Before he knew it, the tub was empty and he felt like he was in danger of splitting in two.

 

“Might have been a bad idea,” Jacob said with a groan.

 

“Nope,” Paul responded simply.

 

He put the empty carton down, leaving both of his hands free to roam over Jacob's body. He massaged his swollen stomach, making Jacob shudder and squirm in his lap. His skin felt oversensitive and it tingled with every touch. Paul's hands drifted, one finding its way to his hip, the other travelling lower. Jacob bit his lip as Paul's fingers squeezed at where the flesh at his hip swelled over his tight waistband but then his other hand brushed against his cock and he couldn't help the way he twitched. He thrust against his hand, moaning softly and felt a huff of air against his neck as Paul laughed.

 

“I didn't realise you liked it that much,” he said.

 

Jacob felt his mouth go dry as he tried to protest. Paul just shushed him, slipping one hand into his sweatpants to stroke him slowly. Jacob tried to stay quiet, only failing when Paul's other hand elicited a whimper out of him. His fingers were quick, skirting across his stomach and pressing into all of the spots that made him feel like he was melting into Paul's lap.

 

Paul stroked his cock faster, whispering words of encouragement into Jacob's ear and he all but fell apart. Breathing was difficult with such a full stomach. He thrust up into Paul's fist, hands gripping his thighs for balance.

 

Teeth pressed down against the nape of his neck, gentle enough that Jacob knew it wouldn't mark but sharp enough to shock him to the edge of his orgasm. Paul leaned round to kiss him, rough and urgent, both of them gasping for breath as he rolled his hips beneath him. Jacob was caught between wanting to grind down and thrust up; he gave to the latter, hips stuttering against Paul's strokes as he came and collapsed back against his heaving chest as shudders racked his body.

 

Paul helped him to move back onto the chair before standing up and walking over to the sink. He returned with a wet washcloth and cleaned Jacob up. Jacob lazily watched him tidy up the kitchen, too, hiding the empty ice cream pots at the bottom of the bin.

 

Paul put a hand on his shoulder when he was finished. Jacob opened his eyes to find him grinning.

 

“Come on, we should get you back to bed.”

 

Jacob sighed. He was exhausted but Paul helped him to his feet. He placed a hand against the small of his back, letting it slide around his side to Jacob's hip. His touch was warm against his skin, and Jacob followed him out of the kitchen. He felt sluggish but he still noticed the way that Paul's hand drifted up just a little so he could touch his stomach whilst still being able to support him. Jacob wanted to lean into him, but the stairs were enough of a challenge already.

 

When they finally got back into the bedroom to find Emma sleeping soundly, they both exhaled small sounds of relief. Paul helped him out of his clothes and Jacob was so relieved to be back in bed that he almost fell asleep immediately. Paul slipped an arm around him, rousing him slightly and Jacob curled into him. The heat of his body ran through him, easing the ache in his abdomen and Jacob smiled.

 

“Thanks,” he said quietly.

 

“For what?” Paul asked.

 

He didn't get an answer.

  


  


 


	6. Six

Little things made Paul smile. Jacob started to eat more, or, well, actually eat at dinner, despite Emma's scathing looks. He still exercised, but it seemed less intense. When Paul asked him about it, Jacob told him that there was nothing wrong with staying fit, especially in their situation. Paul couldn't help feel a little disappointed at the thought of Jacob's little belly disappearing again, but he was aware of how selfish that was.

 

A few days showed Paul just how little he needed to worry. He was sure that Jacob was still sneaking down to the kitchen at night and he was definitely eating enough during the day. Jacob took a shower when Emma and Joey were playing out in the yard. Paul decided to take the opportunity to join him.

 

“Where are you going?” Emma asked him.

 

“What's it to you?” he replied.

 

He walked upstairs and heard the water shut off. He was disappointed until he saw Jacob walk into the bedroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. By the time he walked through the door, the towel was on the floor and Jacob had on a loose white t-shirt, black boxer briefs and was hastily pulling on a pair of jeans.

 

“Are you in a hurry?” Paul asked, hoping he might be able to convince him to stop getting dressed.

 

“We're going to play baseball,” Jacob said with a grin. “Somehow.”

 

Paul sat down on the bed, watching as Jacob tugged the jeans up to his waist. They were snug around his thighs and Paul knew they wouldn't fit him for much longer. He smirked as Jacob struggled to zip them up, opting to button them first instead. He didn't have any more luck with that.

 

“Let me get you some of mine,” Paul said as Jacob's face flushed crimson.

 

“No,” he breathed, insistently tugging the button into the hole.

 

They pinched at his waist even before he breathed out, squeezing his stomach over the waistband when he did. Paul's heart fluttered in his chest when Jacob zipped them up and pulled his shirt down over the waistband. Even beneath the loose fabric, he could see the way the tight jeans accentuated his abdomen.

 

Jacob's face was pained as he tried to bend over to pick up his socks.

 

“You can't wear those,” Paul told him.

 

He didn't want to upset him but they were way too tight. As much as he'd like to see Jacob try to go about his day in criminally tight jeans, he knew it couldn't be comfortable. He held out a pair of his own, knowing that they had at least four inches more room. Jacob glared at him but took them grudgingly.

 

“I'm going for a run,” he snapped after he was dressed.

 

Later, when Paul asked him about it, Jacob was a little calmer.

 

“I was just embarrassed, okay?” he said. “I need to stop this, though. It's not like we have the means to replace my whole wardrobe.”

 

“You could wear some of my stuff,” Paul offered.

 

“And then what? What if I outgrow those, too?”

 

Paul paused, thinking about what Jacob would looked like if that happened. Paul had always bought his jeans with a little more room than he needed out of preference and Jacob's hips were much narrower than his.

 

“Look, I'm not going to stop eating,” Jacob said. “I just need to get rid of this before it gets out of control.”

 

He punctuated his point by grabbing his belly roughly and Paul just stared. It highlighted just how much he had gained. It was more than Paul had thought.

 

“Okay,” he said. “Help yourself to my clothes whilst you still need to, though.”

 

He hoped it sounded encouraging, in spite of the way he felt.

 

“Thanks.”

 

 

  


Jacob barely ate after that. He made a point of eating something in front of Emma, but he still left the dinner table hungry each night. He jogged around the yard without prompting, but Paul was happy to see that he didn't push himself as hard as Emma had.

 

Paul knew that he was really trying but it didn't seem to do much good. After a week of working out and under eating, Jacob was still wearing Paul's jeans and each morning, he looked a little more disappointed.

 

Paul managed to corner him in the bathroom after lunch. Jacob's eyes flitted nervously downwards as Paul's hands found their way to his hips. He was soft under his touch and Paul had to stop himself from slipping a hand under Jacob's shirt to feel just how badly his attempt at losing weight had been going. Instead, he crowded Jacob up against the wall, kissing him gently until Jacob's arms relaxed around his shoulders. When they pulled apart, Jacob still looked worried.

 

“What's wrong?” Paul asked.

 

“I... why do you like me?” Jacob asked.

 

It was a ridiculous question and Paul could think of a million ways to answer it, but he knew what Jacob was really asking, and he couldn't think of a way to respond to that.

 

“Too many reasons,” he said instead, pulling Jacob close.

 

Jacob exhaled against him, curling his fingers in Paul's shirt. He took a step back, pulling Paul with him. They kissed, gentle and slow, only pulling apart when they heard footsteps on the stairs.

 

“Jacob?” Joey asked. “Where's Emma?”

 

“I don't know,” Jacob said, smiling and walking towards Joey. “Let's go find her.”

 

He looked back at Paul, shrugging and looking apologetic. Paul shook his head and smiled.

 

That night, Paul woke up and the bed beside him was cold. Emma was soundly asleep and he could hear movement downstairs.

  


  


  


Jacob cursed himself as he reached into the cupboards for the third time that night. He could feel the sugar buzzing around in his body. Everything he'd already done, going to bed hungry, jogging for an hour, it was all for nothing. The harder he tried to stick to his plans, the more stressed he could feel himself getting. He'd really tried, he had, but he'd still found his way down to the kitchen and he was nearly out of food.

 

He sat down slowly, feeling a little nauseous as he looked at all of the empty food wrappers around him. He had eaten too much, he knew it, but he was only just cresting on being full. Part of him wanted to just go back to bed but another wanted to look for more food.

 

He jumped when he heard footsteps on the stairs but it was just Paul. He looked away when Paul smiled at him because he couldn't bare to look at him when he'd been caught again. He tried to tidy up the mess in front of him but Paul put a hand on his arm.

 

“Did you eat all of this?” he asked, gesturing around at the empty packaging.

 

Jacob nodded, his face heating up with embarrassment.

 

“Hey...” Paul said quietly. “Don't worry, just maybe you need to stop starving yourself in the daytime, yeah?”

 

Jacob rolled his eyes, because Paul was right and he was being an idiot. He winced as a wave of nausea passed over him.

 

“You don't looked so great, do you need a drink?” Paul asked.

 

Jacob shook his head and swallowed convulsively. He could feel all of the junk food settling in his stomach, but he still felt empty.

 

“No, probably just too much sugar,” he said.

 

Paul walked over to the kitchen cabinets. Jacob knew they were pretty much empty.

 

“Let me cook you something,” Paul said. “You need to eat something substantial to counter all of the junk. It'll make you feel better.”

 

Jacob felt sluggish and he knew he should just go back to bed, but Paul already had a bag of pasta out with vegetables lined up beside it.

 

“Go on then,” he said. “Not too much, though.”

 

Paul grinned at him and pulled a saucepan out from below the stove. Jacob watched him fill it with water and put it on the stove to boil. Whilst it heated, Paul walked around the kitchen and cleaned all of the wrappers and crumbs away into a bag.

 

Paul cooked the pasta, drained it and then rinsed the pan. Jacob watched him chop the vegetables and open a can of chopped tomatoes.

 

“Not as good as fresh, but I haven't got much to work with here,” Paul said apologetically.

 

“It's fine,” Jacob replied. “It's good.”

 

When the sauce was ready, Paul stirred in the pasta and grabbed two bowls out of a cupboard. The bowl that he set down in front of Jacob was considerably larger than his own. Jacob raised an eyebrow.

 

“What?” Paul asked. “I ate my dinner ... You don't have to finish it if it's too much.”

 

The canned tomatoes didn't seem to make a difference. The sauce was delicious and after all of the shit he'd been eating, it tasted fantastic. Jacob said so and Paul grinned around a forkful of pasta.

 

Jacob shovelled a huge forkful into his mouth, hardly caring that Paul was watching him. The feeling of fullness overtook him quickly but it just replaced the nausea and made him feel better.

 

He got halfway through the bowl before he really started to feel it, his belly warm and too full.

 

“Good?” Paul asked.

 

He still had a lot of food left but Jacob knew he wasn't really eating it, choosing to watch him instead.

 

“Yeah,” Jacob told him. “Yeah, it's really good.”

 

Jacob put down the fork and ran a hand over his full stomach. He was sleepy and warm; he felt a thrill when he saw the way Paul's eyes were raking over him. It was kind of weird. Jacob wasn't sure he understood, but he did know that what Paul enjoyed didn't stop him from eating what he wanted.

 

He picked up the fork again, testing his theory. Paul's lips twitched as he raised a particularly large forkful to his mouth. It still tasted good so Jacob didn't struggle too much. The onions and zucchini were fantastic, making the sauce delicious without the need for any herbs and spices. Maybe it was just because of the comparison to Jacob's diet over the last week, perhaps it was just because he really needed something simple but substantial to eat.

 

“I don't know if I'm going to be able to finish this,” Jacob lied.

 

He knew he could. He knew it would be a push and that he probably would be quite uncomfortable after; a large bowl of pasta on top of a stomach full of cookies and chips was a push even for him.

 

“I told you, you don't have to,” Paul said.

 

His voice was rough and there was something hopeful in it.

 

“No,” Jacob said. “No, I want to. It's really good. I'm going to try.”

 

Jacob saw Paul swallow, his eyes flicking down to where Jacob knew his stomach must have been straining against his t-shirt. Paul's face was flushed when he met Jacob's eyes again and he only offered a nod in response.

  
  


 

Jacob picked his fork up again as readied himself. He could feel Paul's eyes on him as he dug it into his bowl. He had at least a third of it left but he knew if he ate it quickly, he'd be able to finish it before his brain caught up with him. Three mouthfuls in and he started to really feel how much of a task he had in front of him. The sauce was thick and the combination of that and the starchy pasta was filling him up more quickly than he had thought.

 

He managed to eat another two forkfuls without stopping. The situation was strange; Paul was silent as he ate, not knowing where to look. He felt relaxed around Paul, he always had, but there was a tension in the air that made him stop and look up.

 

“Thanks for cooking for me,” he said, to break the silence.

 

“Not a problem,” Paul replied.

 

Jacob looked back down at his bowl. He knew he had about five mouthfuls left but that seemed like too much. He piled his fork high and struggled to swallow it. He winced and put his fork down, clutching his stomach and taking slow, shallow breaths.

 

“Are you okay?” Paul asked.

 

He sounded worried but there was a touch of curiosity to his question, too. Jacob nodded, running his hand down his distended stomach. It was firm under his touch but it got softer the further down he went. His sweatpants were starting to get tight around his thighs when he sat down but they'd been loose enough around his waist when he'd put them on. They had been getting increasingly more tight since he'd started eating the pasta, though, so he adjusted them, pulling them down below the curve of his belly to rest against hips. Paul's mouth twitched when Jacob sighed at the immediate relief. He still felt the immense fullness in his upper abdomen but without the constricting waistband, he felt able to eat again.

 

Jacob ate as quickly as he could, knowing he'd regret it soon enough but he was determined to finish. The last mouthful was a struggle but Paul's grin when he put his fork down in his empty bowl was worth it.

 

“I'm impressed,” he said.

 

“You better be,” Jacob replied.

 

He pressed his palm against his stomach stifling a groan as Paul stood up to take his bowl. He felt a little guilty as he watched Paul wash everything up but he was dreading even standing so helping was out of the question. With his sweatpants pushed so low, there was nothing to cover the bottom curve of his belly. He tried to pull him shirt lower but it was a futile attempt. He'd have to raid Paul's wardrobe, or at least stop wearing his smallest shirts.

 

The kitchen was pristine again as Jacob stood up with Paul's help. He realised their actions were becoming routine. Paul waited for him to steady himself before moving. Jacob felt top heavy as he climbed the stairs, one hand resting lightly under his belly to try to take the pressure off.

 

He didn't even want to bother getting undressed, but the less questions from Emma in the morning, the better. He kicked off his sweatpants and pulled off his t shirt before crawling into bed and waiting for Paul.

 

He felt the bed dip as Paul got in and he tensed when he felt his warm hands slide onto his stomach. It was one thing pushing himself to eat so he could see Paul's reaction and another thing to have him touch him there. He knew his stomach felt huge and swollen and he kept expecting Paul to pull away. Instead, he ran his hands over his skin before finding Jacob's face in the dark and kissing him on the forehead.

 

“Go to sleep,” he said quietly. “You should rest.”

 

Jacob wanted to protest because he'd seen the expression on Paul's face in the kitchen but they would wake Emma up if they tried anything and she'd be able to feel how much he'd eaten in an instant. Jacob yawned, he was tired, if only because of everything he'd eaten. He tried to get comfortable but he felt too heavy. On his back, he felt almost pinned down but it was marginally better than being on his side.

 

Eventually he found a position that didn't make him feel too bloated and he fell asleep.

 

Jacob still felt sluggish when he awoke the next morning. Paul grinned at him when he opened his eyes. His hair was wet, fresh from the shower when he got back into bed.

 

“What time is it?” Jacob asked.

 

“Nearly noon,” Paul said. “Emma's busy with Joey, she wont notice.”

 

Jacob stretched and groaned. He didn't want to get out of bed. Paul moved closer to him, his skin warm and damp against Jacob's. His hands went straight to his stomach but Jacob didn't protest. He still felt full and he knew Paul would be able to feel it, too.

 

“How are you feeling?” Paul asked.

 

“Weird,” Jacob said. “How can I still be full?”

 

Paul's fingers twitched on his stomach. Jacob knew he was testing the firmness of it so he rolled onto his side to make it easier.

 

Paul slid his hand down, pinching his skin softly. Jacob was surprised to see how little his flesh was giving. He squirmed a little when Paul started to run his palm around his belly in sweeping, concentric circles. Warmth spread through his abdomen at Paul's touch.

 

“I'm going to help you, okay?” Paul asked.

 

Jacob nodded. He wasn't that uncomfortable, not really but it felt good and he knew Paul was enjoying it too. Paul placed his free hand back on Jacob's stomach, feeling his way down his sides. Paul's hands lingered at Jacob's hips, squeezing subtly for just a second but Jacob noticed. He flushed at the thought of Paul touching him, no, groping him there. There, where his love handles were thickening by the day, becoming more obvious, even without tight jeans to push them up. He bit his lip when Paul's hands moved around and together, thumbs pressing into the bottom of the curve of his belly, where his flesh was soft again after the fullness had started to fade. Nerves fluttered in his chest as lust coiled in his stomach. Jacob stared up at the ceiling, avoiding Paul's eyes as a thumb swiped over his navel, dipping in for just a second. His cock twitched, making Jacob gasp in surprise. It began to harden as Paul slid down Jacob's body, pressing his lips to the firm dome of his upper abdomen.

 

An involuntary whine escaped Jacob, his thighs tensing as Paul ran his tongue down his stomach. Paul looked up at him, smirking. His hands slid down further, one sweeping slowly down the length of Jacob's cock. Jacob frowned when Paul didn't stop there; his hands kept moving lower, running along the curve of his ass and down his legs. Paul squeezed Jacob's thighs experimentally, moving back up to rest at the top of them where Jacob knew they'd gotten softer and wider.

 

His hips twitched and he had to resist the urge to thrust up into nothing.

 

“Everything okay?” Paul asked smugly.

 

Jacob rolled his eyes.

 

“Yeah, everything's great,” he said.

 

Paul grinned at the sarcasm but he seemed to take pity on him. He began to move further down Jacob's body, kissing his belly and once, biting him just hard enough to make his hairs stand on end.

 

Paul looked up at Jacob before shifting onto his knees and moving above him. He ran his tongue up Jacob's cock slowly before sucking it into his mouth. Jacob's fists clenched, twisting in the sheets as Paul swirled his tongue maddeningly. He glanced up, attempting to make eye contact but his gaze was mostly obscured by Jacob's stomach.

 

Jacob felt his face flush furiously. He wasn't even sure if it was due to embarrassment, lust, or the physical effects of Paul's very effective blowjob. From what he could see, Paul's pupils were fully dilated. When he pulled back to draw breath, his lips were slick and swollen. Jacob groaned when Paul slid his mouth back down onto him. It didn't take much to push him over the edge. Paul swallowed around him, throat convulsing and Jacob lost all composure. They dozed together, not speaking until Paul broke the silence.

 

“You're pretty quiet,” Paul said.

 

Jacob didn't say anything straight away but Paul didn't push him. He had something he needed to ask, something that had been at the back of his mind for a long time.

 

“You like this,” he said. “You like me... like this.”

 

“Naked?” Paul asked. “I like you with clothes on too, but yeah.”

 

Jacob sighed. It was hard enough to talk about and he was sure Paul was being deliberately obtuse.

 

“No... like this,” Jacob said again, gesturing towards his stomach for emphasis.

 

Paul was silent so Jacob took the opportunity to continue. He couldn't risk getting derailed or he'd never ask what he needed to.

 

“Is that why you like me?” he asked. “Because of this.”

 

“No!” Paul exclaimed immediately. “No, I just told you, I like you. I like you for you and... this happens to look good on you.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I always liked you, you must know that,” Paul said. “I liked you when you were skinny, I like you now. I just might have a... preference.”

 

“A preference?” Jacob asked.

 

Paul looked up at him, worried.

 

“Maybe? I don't know,” he said. “Come on, it's hardly the weirdest thing about me.”

 

“No... that's true,” Jacob said with a laugh. “But what are you saying, you prefer me like this? You want me to gain weight?”

 

Paul sat up. He looked at Jacob, suddenly very serious.

 

“No,” he said. “I like you however you are. Nothing could make me like you more or less I just... I can't help it, it's a thing. I just like it but I wouldn't want you to do anything for me.”

 

It was the most Jacob had heard Paul talk about his feelings on anything for a long time. Sober, it might have been the longest he'd ever spoken about his feelings.

 

“Okay,” Jacob said simply.

 

“Okay?” Paul asked, frowning.

 

“Yeah, like you said, it's not that weird.” Jacob said. “I just needed to know if that was all you were interested in.”

 

“It's not,” Paul said again. “I...”

 

“I know, it's okay,” Jacob cut in. “You like me, it's okay.”

 

Paul sighed and rubbed his hand over his face.

 

“No,” he said. “No, I...”

 

Jacob raised his eyebrows, unsure if Paul was actually planning on finishing his sentence.

 

“That just sounds dumb, doesn't it?” Paul asked. “'I like you' like we're six years old or something.”

 

“Shut up,” Jacob said. “I have another question. What if I wanted to see what it was like?”

 

“What?” Paul asked.

 

Jacob's throat went dry and he thought about what he was going to say. The way Paul touched him, the way he cared about him and the way his focus would narrow in on Jacob's stomach in the best way, it did something to him. Paul had been nothing but patient with him and Jacob wanted to repay that somehow. It wasn't just that, though. He wanted to try it. He wanted to see how Paul reacted and how he'd look and he wanted to stop feeling guilty about everything.

 

“What if I wanted to see what it was like to gain a bit more weight?” he asked. “Maybe ten more pounds?”

 

Paul just stared at him, lips slightly parted.

 

“Twenty?”

 

Paul groaned and buried his head in the pillow.

 

 

 


	7. Seven

Paul didn't let himself get his hopes up. Jacob was indecisive and changed his mind at the worst of times, he knew that. Just the idea of Jacob gaining twenty more pounds was enough to distract him, though. He was driving out to meet one of Joe's people but all he could think about was what Jacob what up to, what he was wearing, if it was getting too tight ... He pulled into a gas station, pulling on dark glasses and a cap. He didn't need fuel, but he had twenty minutes to kill before the meeting and an awkwardly timed erection to get rid of. He walked inside, picking up a bottle of soda and some candy. He just needed a walk and something to get his mind off of how willing Jacob had been the night before.

He saw a display of cinnamon buns and realised that, really, a store selling baked goods wasn't the best place to distract himself. He picked up a pack of six, paid for everything and walked back to the car.

Once inside, Paul opened the box of cinnamon buns. They were large and glazed and smelled amazing. He took a bite of one, savouring the freshly baked taste. He closed the box, stowing the rest of them in the glove compartment before taking another bite. It was rich; he certainly wouldn't have been able to eat more than one, but he wondered if Jacob would be able to. When he finished it, he put the candy in the glove compartment too; he hadn't expected the cinnamon bun to fill him up quite so much. It had been doughier than expected. He took a deep breath and tried not to think about Jacob.

Paul got to the parking lot three minutes early but the black sedan was already parked where they'd arranged. He checked himself in the mirror, making sure his face wasn't covered in frosting before getting out of the car. He walked around to the passenger seat of the sedan and got in. He didn't recognise the sandy hair and chiseled jawline of the man inside.

“Paul, right?” the man asked.

Paul nodded, and he wasn't offered a name in return.

“Why couldn't we just talk over the phone?” Paul asked.

“We need to move you, maybe next week,” the man told him. “Too sensitive to be spoken of over the phone. You have Joe's kid.”

“Right,” Paul agreed. “Why are you moving us?”

He knew better than to ask for the location. He probably wasn't going to be told much.

“Just to be safe,” the man said. “The FBI is looking for you and they've had more than enough time to make decent progress. We're going to need you all to be packed a week from now. We'll send a car.”

“Okay,” Paul said.

“We won’t be going far,” the man told him. “There'll be others where we take you, it won’t have to be just the four of you any more.”

The man gave Paul a new burner phone for emergencies. His number was the only one programmed in. There was still no name, just a full stop as a placeholder. Paul thanked him and left the car. He watched the sedan pull out of the parking lot before starting his own engine and driving in the opposite direction.

Paul walked back into the house and the first thing he heard was shouting. It threw him for a second because he couldn't remember ever hearing Jacob disagreeing with Emma, much less shouting at her.

“I haven't left the house in ages, Emma! I'm going!” Paul heard as he walked through to the kitchen.

“Yes, because junk food is just what Joey needs,” Emma said scathingly.

She glared at Paul when she saw him in the doorway before turning and leaving.

“What was that about?” Paul asked, frowning.

“Nothing,” Jacob said. “I just volunteered to go get the groceries and Emma told me I obviously didn't know anything about nutrition. You know, the usual.”

Jacob rolled his eyes but he didn't look fazed. Paul was surprised that Jacob hadn't taken it badly, but he was glad. It was good to see him taking control of his own life again.

“I'm still going,” Jacob said. “Tomorrow. You want to come and help?”

Paul smirked, thinking about saying yes and going along with Jacob to buy everything that Emma wouldn't approve of. He shook his head.

“It's too risky and I think both of us leaving together might push Emma over the edge,” he said.

“Exactly,” Jacob said with a grin.

“No ... you go, just be careful,” Paul said. “Take a disguise.”

 

Paul spent the rest of the afternoon in the yard, mowing the grass for something to do. It felt normal, more like what his life had been like before they'd taken Joey, and he relished the feeling of grass and sweat on his skin. He put the lawnmower away in the small shed towards the back of the yard before walking back into the house. He needed a shower, so he went upstairs to his room and pulled his shirt off.

His bed, the one that he'd taken when they'd first moved into the farmhouse, hadn't been slept in for a week. It still felt strange sleeping with Jacob and Emma at night, like he was a guest in their room. It had felt worse since he and Jacob had been getting closer, because it wasn't just a means to an end. He should be sleeping in his own room with Jacob right next to him.

He stepped out of his jeans and grabbed a towel. He froze in the doorway to the bathroom. Jacob was sitting on the edge of the bathtub and grinning up at him. He was wearing a white t-shirt that stretched tightly over his stomach and a pair of Paul's tightest jeans.

“Hi,” he said. “I was hoping you'd be up soon.”

His eyes trailed down Paul's body before he straightened his back, leaning back as much as he could on the narrow edge of the tub. The shirt rode up just a little, showing the barest stretch of skin, and Paul had the feeling he'd chosen his clothing with intent.

“Were you waiting for me?” Paul asked.

Jacob nodded, standing up and tugging the shirt back down over his abdomen. Paul could see a faint dip where the fabric clung to the curve of his navel.

“I thought we could do something fun,” Jacob said.

“What did you have in mind?” Paul asked.

Jacob glanced down to the corner of the bathroom, where the scales were balanced against the wall. Paul hadn't expect that. He'd seen the way that Jacob had looked after Emma had made him weigh himself before. His surprise must have shown on his face.

“It makes sense, doesn't it?” Jacob asked. “If I'm going to put a few pounds on, I need to have a way of telling, don't I?”

Jacob grinned and moved the scales to the middle of the room. Paul turned to close the door. They didn't need Emma's input.

“It's a shame I don't know how much I weighed when I got here,” Jacob said. “I guess I could ask Emma under the pretence of losing all of this. I'm sure she'd remember.”

Paul looked down at his feet.

“I remember,” he said.

“You do?” Jacob said. “Great.”

He took his jeans off and stepped onto the scale. Paul watched the red display flash three times before landing on a round 210 lbs.

“So, what's the verdict?” Jacob asked.

He looked down at the reading and back up at Paul.

“Uh ...” Paul said. “That's ... you're up twenty nine pounds since Emma first weighed you.”

It didn't seem like a lot but if that little had such an effect on his body, Paul could only imagine what another twenty pounds would do to his frame. He only seemed to really put weight on in certain areas: his ass, his thighs and, most importantly, his stomach. It made him look like he'd put on more than he actually had.

“Really?” Jacob asked. “So another twenty ... that would be quite a lot, then.”

“If you're rethinking it,” Paul said, “you can back out, it's up to you.”

Jacob shook his head and stepped off of the scales.

“No, no, that's not it. I was just wondering if it would even show,” he said. “I think it will, though. If not, I'll just have to keep going, wont I?”

He stepped closer to Paul, running his hands down to the waistband of his underwear. Paul was slightly thrown by how forward Jacob was being, but he supposed it was something he should get used to. It was something he was really looking forward to. Jacob kissed him and reached into the shower to turn it on. The water splashed against the rumpled shower curtain. Jacob pulled back and tugged at his t-shirt, struggling to pull the tight fabric off himself. Paul stood and watched as he tugged at the button of his jeans, sucking in his stomach so he could get them off.

Paul followed him into the shower, unable to stop himself from reaching out to squeeze Jacob's ass. He ran his thumb up, circling it over the tiny dimples that had formed at the bottom of his back as he rounded out.

Jacob spun around and laughed, pulling Paul closer to him, under the water.

“I can't stay,” Jacob told him.

“Huh?” Paul asked.

“I need to get going soon, I don't want to leave it too late.”

“Stay a while,” Paul said.

Jacob nodded and pressed himself against Paul, squeezing them both up against the wall. Paul ran his hands down Jacob's sides, squeezing at his hips. Jacob smirked when Paul let out a shuddering breath, his hands dropping down to the beginnings of his thighs.

Jacob moved back a step before dropping down to his knees in front of Paul. He did it so suddenly that Paul almost protested - he’d been about to do the same thing - but then Jacob's lips were around the head of his cock and all rational thought went out the window.

Jacob looked up at him, blinking when the water hit him in the face as sucked Paul into his mouth. His lips looked full around his cock and Paul's breath hitched when he saw Jacob's tongue peek out around his shaft.

He wasn't going to last long and Jacob's grin told him that he was aware of the effect he was having. He sped up, making Paul feel like his knees were about to give out. Paul braced himself against the cold tiles, trying to get some kind of grip, as Jacob was relentless. His tongue swirled maddeningly and his hands pulled at Paul's hips, making him thrust forwards.

Paul felt his toes curl, his fingers curling in Jacob's wet hair as he felt his orgasm building. He tried to warn Jacob but he couldn't get any words out. It hit him hard; Paul was surprised when he didn't slip. Jacob didn't even flinch, he just swallowed, moaning around Paul's cock, mouth curved into the best smirk he could manage at that moment.

He wiped his mouth and stood up, grinning from ear to ear as Paul struggled to clear his head.

“I should head out,” Jacob said.

“Now?” Paul asked groggily.

“If I don't do it now,” Jacob said, “Emma won’t let me go.”

Paul sighed, but he was excited to see what Jacob would come back with, so he had to let him go. Jacob dried himself with Paul's towel, barely managing to get his clothes back on over his damp skin. Paul watched him go before sinking down to sit under the shower. His legs felt like jelly. The water hammered on his skin and it felt far away. He was going to get up and turn it off eventually. He'd do it when he found the energy.

  
  
  


It was strange being alone in the house with Emma and Joey. Paul tried to keep himself busy but he couldn't help being a little nervous. Jacob hadn't been out of the house in a long time and the FBI's search had become more intense. Every second that he was gone made Paul think of the worst that could have happened.

Jacob wasn't actually gone long at all. Paul heard the front door open and close so he walked downstairs to see if he needed help putting the food away. Emma's eyebrows rose when Jacob started unpacking the bags. He had bought fresh fruit and vegetables, and Paul couldn't see any junk food in sight.

“I'm impressed,” Emma said, although she sounded nothing like it.

Paul couldn't help being a little disappointed; maybe it was Jacob's way of telling him he'd changed his mind after all.

“We didn't need much,” Jacob said. “I thought it was time we had some healthy food around here for a change.”

Emma lingered, watching Jacob unload the rest of the food and supplies. Paul helped to put it away, all too aware of the tension in the room. Eventually, Joey called Emma away and Jacob stopped cramming vegetables into the fridge. He stood up straight, visibly listening to Emma's retreating footsteps. He turned to Paul and grinned before walking quietly to the door that lead from the kitchen to the back yard. He opened it slowly, wincing when it creaked. Paul grinned when he saw the grocery bag sitting on the grass.

“You didn't think that was all I'd bought, did you?” he asked.

Paul shrugged, because what else could he have thought? Jacob brought the bag inside and set it on the kitchen counter before closing the door. He hid the ice cream (Chubby Hubby, Chunky Monkey, and Phish Food, Paul was amused to see) at the back of the freezer.

“I bought some more pasta,” Jacob said. “You know, in case you felt like cooking for me again. You've got fresh ingredients to work with now, too.”

Paul smiled, because he'd seen the fresh herbs and his mind had gone to exactly the same place. He looked at the rest of the contents of the bag. Jacob had bought cookie dough, two tubs of icing, a few packs of cookies and, probably just to break up the sweetness, two bags of chips.

“What are you going to do with the rest?” Paul asked. “I don't think you should just leave it all outside.”

“Don't worry, I've got a good hiding place. Go distract Emma for me.”

Paul could do that. He thought of all of the things he'd had to hide from people before and all of the times he'd been secretive. It had never been for something so innocuous, but helping Jacob felt just as important as anything else. He found Emma in the yard, showing Joey how to use a magnifying glass to start a fire.

“Should you really be showing him that?” he asked.

“Are you getting protective all of a sudden?” she countered.

“No,” he said. “I just thought that we shouldn't have to worry about him burning the house down.”

From behind her, he saw Jacob walk quickly up the stairs with the bag full of food and he fought not to lick his lips.

“What do you want, Paul?” she asked.

“I was just thinking about dinner tonight, and Jacob bought so much fresh food that I thought I could cook us something good,” he said. “How about pasta?”

He addressed the question to both of them and Joey smiled up at Paul, nodding. Emma just looked at him like he was boring her. He probably was.

“Sure, why not?”

Paul got to work, looking at his ingredients and thinking of the possibilities. He had oregano and basil; Jacob knew what he liked to cook with. There were fresh tomatoes, spinach, peppers, and even his favourite brand of olive oil. He pulled out everything he needed and set it all on the table.

He looked back in the fridge and spotted the chicken breasts. He grabbed them, too, slicing them into strips before slicing some peppers and onions, mixing them in and putting them in the oven.

Whilst that was cooking, Paul started on the sauce. He used the rest of the peppers, along with a few onions and the tomatoes. Jacob appeared as he started to roughly chop the fresh herbs on a board and added them to the pot.

“Whatever that is, it smells great,” he said, walking over to the stove.

“I'm making pasta,” Paul said. “Properly this time.”

It was really nice just to be able to use something other than jarred sauces for once. It made Paul feel like they were edging towards normality, even though he knew that they were so far from that in so many ways. He stirred the sauce, moving the blender to the sink to soak.

“I haven't seen you cook like this in ages,” Jacob said.

He sat down and Paul remembered the Sundays they'd spent together. Jacob always used to sit on one of the kitchen counters and watch him cook. It had been annoying because their kitchen space had been too small already, but Paul hadn't said anything because he'd loved the company.

“It's good,” Paul said. “Thank you for getting all of this.”

Paul put a lid on the pot, letting it simmer for a few minutes whilst he cleaned up a little and checked on the chicken. It was done, the juices from the meat and vegetables mixing together. He added it all to the sauce, stirring it in gently before filling another pot with water and putting it over the heat. He added a little salt to the water and waited for it to start bubbling before adding in the pasta. He used six handfuls, knowing that there would be plenty left over, in case they needed it.

At some point between Paul stirring the pasta and adding seasoning to the sauce, Jacob began to set the table.

“Make sure you give me enough pasta, okay?” he asked. “I'm starving.”

Paul wasn't sure if that was true or not, because if he knew Jacob, he was sure he would have bought something extra to eat on the way home with the groceries, but he nodded. Jacob kissed him on the cheek before running outside to tell Emma that dinner was almost ready.

The initiation of contact made Paul freeze until he heard the pasta beginning to boil over. He turned down the heat and tried to think of another time that Jacob had done that. It was rare, especially with him. He'd always found Jacob's sexuality to be sort of reliant on whoever showed him the most affection, so he rarely initiated anything, but didn't resist when Paul started something with him.

Paul drained the pasta and began serving it into bowls. He gave himself and Emma one serving spoonful each, half for Joey and then he lingered over Jacob's bowl. He didn't want to push him and he really didn't want Emma to notice anything. He put two spoons of pasta into Jacob's bowl, moving it around so it didn't look quite as much. Next he ladled on the sauce, putting a little more on his and Emma's to make the size difference less obvious. He put less chicken on Jacob's too, telling himself it was to make their bowls look the same size and not because he knew that protein filled people up faster.

It wasn't like the meal was really going to fill Jacob up, not with how much Paul knew he could eat, but it was a large portion. He didn't want it to be too obvious when he was still eating after everyone was finished.

That turned out to not be a problem. Jacob ate with fervour once they were all seated, only stopping to repeatedly tell Paul how good it was. Paul couldn't look at him, not with Emma and Joey with them. He was sure Jacob was trying to make him blush and it was working. Even when he kept his eyes on his own bowl, he could hear small noises of pleasure every now and then and he was quite surprised that Emma hadn't spoken up yet.

When Paul did look up, he saw a look of mixed disbelief and fury on her face as she watched Jacob eat. His bowl was half gone and she'd barely touched hers. Paul made eye contact with Jacob and they shared a small smile before going back to their food.

As soon as Joey finished his food, Emma used that as an excuse to leave the table with him. Jacob's face lit up, such a contrast to how he had reacted to Emma's anger just a few short weeks before. Paul couldn't help smiling at how comfortable he seemed with himself as he finished the food in his bowl.

Paul stood up and cleared the bowls from the table and left them in the sink to soak. He turned around to see Jacob leaning back against his chair, a look of blissful serenity on his face as he stretched and yawned.

“That was good,” he said. “Really good. I should get you fresh ingredients more often.”

Paul smirked and transferred the pasta he hadn't used into a bowl and poured the leftover sauce on top of it. He mixed them together before covering the bowl and putting it into the fridge. There was enough there for another portion, maybe two small ones. He was sure he'd find a use for them.

Jacob got up and helped him clean up the rest of the kitchen, wiping the sides and placing everything dirty into the sink.

“I take it I gave you enough, then,” Paul said.

“Yeah,” Jacob replied. “I mean I can still walk, but yeah, I'm full enough.”

He grinned and Paul took a slow, shaky breath. Emma and Joey were just in the other room.

Jacob decided that they were all going to watch a movie. It had been a long time since Paul had even really watched television, besides the news. He wasn't sure about Joey; they didn't really have anything suitable for children to watch. Jacob had picked up a DVD of Finding Nemo at the store. It had been a favourite of his pupils’ when he'd still been teaching. That was what he'd said, anyway, but Paul knew he loved it, too.

Even Emma stopped scowling by the time they were ten minutes in, and Paul enjoyed the way Jacob relaxed against him. All in all, it was a good night. Joey fell asleep in front of the television and Emma took him up to bed. Paul did the washing up whilst Jacob took a shower and Emma took the time to start packing some of their things.

“So ... did you leave the cinnamon buns in the car on purpose?” Jacob asked from behind him.

Paul had completely forgotten about them.

“No,” he said. “I forgot. Are there any left?”

Jacob shook his head. Paul thought about him driving home from the store, eating one after the other, until all five were gone, and still coming home and eating a huge portion of pasta. Paul was impressed.

“I'm amazed you still managed to eat all of your dinner,” he said.

Jacob grinned at him and shrugged.

“I've gotten used to it,” he said.

They watched a few reruns of Law and Order before their tiredness eventually caught up on them. Paul had been hoping that Emma would have gone to bed but she'd been up and down the stairs too many times for them to get away with anything.

“Come on, let's go to bed,” Jacob said when the episode they'd been watching came to a close.

Paul didn't protest. They went upstairs, to find Emma already in bed but still awake. Paul braced himself, but she didn't say anything. She didn't even acknowledge Jacob when he crawled into bed next to her.

Paul didn't know what to make of it, so he didn't comment. He had learned early never to underestimate Emma, so he didn't want to jump to conclusions. It looked like she'd finally given up and lost interest in Jacob, but he couldn't be sure.

Jacob tossed and turned beside him. Paul didn't know how Emma could just fall asleep with him moving around like that. Paul liked the intimacy of sleeping in the same bed as Jacob, but he found the sleeping part actually difficult, unless he was so tired he passed out.

Eventually, Jacob rose up on his elbows and grinned in the darkness.

“I can't sleep,” he said.

“No shit,” Paul said.

Jacob laughed, and Emma stirred but she didn't wake up.

“I think I need ice cream,” Jacob said.

Paul paused. He didn't want to encourage him too much, didn't want him to think it was all he cared about, but he was so enthusiastic about that idea that it was hard not to just jump out of bed.

He let Jacob get up first and followed him down to the kitchen. The moon was full, cold light beaming in through the window. It was so bright they didn't bother to turn on the light. Jacob made a beeline for the freezer and Paul took a seat. He didn't expect much; Jacob had already eaten so much already that Paul was surprised he wasn't full. Jacob sat opposite him, setting down a pint of Chubby Hubby on the table. He winked when Paul smirked, looking confident for a split second before a blush tinged his cheeks.

Paul watched as Jacob dug his spoon into the container. He moaned around the first spoonful; a little dramatic, but it still made Paul's mouth go dry. He didn't say anything as Jacob continued to chip away at the ice cream, not stopping until he'd eaten at least a quarter of the pint.

“Ugh,” he said. “I probably should have thought this through.”

“Done?” Paul asked.

He couldn't help being a little disappointed. He could see Jacob's stomach as he leaned back in the chair. His t-shirt was tight, but Paul could tell that he wasn't that full.

“No,” Jacob said, pressing one palm against his face. “Brain freeze.”

Paul laughed. He'd seen that before, Jacob being overeager with ice cream or sorbet and suffering for it.

“Do the thing,” he told him. “With your tongue.”

Jacob nodded, his jaw moving up and down. Paul had taught him that the first week they'd lived together. He still remembered the sceptical look on his face when he'd told him that heating up the roof of his mouth would cure him.

“That's better,” Jacob said. “You want any?”

He tipped the container of ice cream towards Paul, raising his eyebrows. Paul shook his head so Jacob put the lid back on.

“I shouldn't risk any more,” Jacob said.

Paul knew that once he got brain freeze, he was likely to get it again in quick succession. He wanted to see Jacob eat the rest of the pint, but he didn't want to see him in pain.

“Do you think we could get away with watching television without waking Emma?” Jacob asked.

They could probably get away with throwing a party without waking Emma, she slept like the dead, but Paul didn't feel like watching anything. He wanted to get back into bed with Jacob and feel his skin against his own so he shook his head.

“I don't really want to watch anything,” he said. “Is that okay?”

Jacob nodded, standing up to put the ice cream back in the freezer.

“I want to do something,” he said.

“What?” Paul asked, intrigued.

“I just ... I think it might cause problems, but I still really want to do it.”

“What is it?” Paul asked again.

“I'll show you,” Jacob replied.

Jacob put the ice cream away and quickly washed up his spoon before leading Paul upstairs. It looked like he just wanted to go back to bed until he turned down a corridor, pulling Paul with him. He stopped at the entrance to Paul's room.

“Can we sleep in here?” he asked.

Paul knew Emma wouldn't like it, but that was just another reason why he wanted to say yes. He thought about how good it would feel to be able to stretch out at night, not to be cramped by their three-in-a-bed scenario.

He didn't even need to say yes. He pulled Jacob inside and shut the door behind them. His room was far enough away from Emma's (and Joey's) that he didn't even have to worry about the sound his belt made as it hit the floor. It was one of the only benefits of the farmhouse.

Jacob took his – or Paul's – jeans off. With those removed, Paul could see the curve of his stomach beneath his now too-short t-shirt. Paul kept undressing, but Jacob got into bed with his underwear and shirt still on. Paul frowned but got into bed beside him.

“I'm still hungry,” Jacob said.

“Well, you should have thought of that when we were in the kitchen,” Paul said, confused.

Jacob grinned mischievously. He leant over the bed, reaching underneath. Something rustled, and then Jacob sat up with the same bag from earlier clutched in his hands.

It made sense. Emma would have no reason to go into Paul's room, especially as she knew he didn't even use it. Jacob handed the bag to Paul.

“Your choice,” Jacob told him. “I am kind of full, though.”

Paul looked in the bag. He saw that Jacob had added a couple of cans of soda from the fridge. He picked out a container of cookies, not wanting to push for anything too heavy.

Jacob grinned when he gave them to him.

“You think you can handle these?” Paul asked.

“Yeah,” Jacob said. “Yeah, I mean, there's kind of a lot of them, you might have to help me out towards the end.”

He smirked as Paul felt the colour rise in his cheeks. Jacob peeled opened the package and pulled one cookie out. He took a bite and Paul pulled a can of soda out of the bag before stowing it back under the bed. He popped it open and handed it to Jacob once he'd finished his cookie.

“Thanks,” Jacob said.

He took a sip and handed it back to Paul before pulling another two cookies out of the packet. He ate them quickly, careful not to get any crumbs on the bed. It didn't take long for him to get half way through the cookies and start to slow down. He took another gulp of soda, one hand coming up to rest at his solar plexus. Paul could see the way his stomach was beginning to strain against his tshirt.

Jacob put the package down after another cookie. He groaned and shifted, leaning back against the headboard and trying to get comfortable.

“Can you ... uh ...” Jacob started.

“What?” Paul asked.

Jacob shook his head and looked down at this hands. Paul crawled closer to him and Jacob looked back up. He grabbed Paul's hand and placed it on his stomach. Paul shuddered as he felt how firm it was against his skin and he knew what Jacob wanted. He let his fingers dance across the round bulge of his abdomen, pressing them in sporadically, rubbing his palm in large circles to try to ease the tightness Jacob was undoubtedly feeling. He kissed him gently, waiting for Jacob to kiss him back. It turned into something rougher and biting; Jacob moaned into his mouth, turning awkwardly due to the added weight in his stomach. Paul ran his hand down, pleased to find Jacob was already fully hard. He stroked him hard and fast, biting his lip when he bucked into his fist.

“Are you going to finish the cookies?” Paul asked quietly.

“I think I'm gonna need help,” Jacob admitted.

Paul pulled back, picking a cookie out of the packet and held it up for Jacob to bite. He kept stroking him as Jacob chewed, his eyes squeezed shut.

After he finished, Jacob opened his mouth again, a low moan escaping him before Paul managed to press another cookie between his lips. Paul slowed his strokes on Jacob's cock before removing his hand completely. Jacob whimpered at the loss of friction but he didn't want it to end yet. Paul compensated a little, moving both of his hands to Jacob's stomach, massaging it until he hummed with pleasure. Jacob grabbed the can of soda, draining it, his stomach swelling outwards with every gulp.

Paul rolled off of the bed quickly, taking Jacob by surprise.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

Paul rummaged around in one of the bags he'd brought when they'd first arrived. He knew he'd packed it somewhere. Finally his fingers closed around something smooth and cool. He pulled the lube out of the bag and held it up, raising his eyebrows. A question.

Jacob looked apprehensive. They'd played with it before and Jacob definitely enjoyed a bit of prostate stimulation but Paul palmed his own cock, making his intentions clear.

“You'll be gentle?” Jacob asked.

Paul scoffed but Jacob shook his head, laughing.

“No, I mean, I'm really full,” he said, pressing a palm into his stomach for emphasis. “I don't know if I could take anything too rough.”

Paul swallowed convulsively, thinking about the extra pressure he'd be adding. He walked back over to the bed, crawling in between Jacob's legs. He kissed him hard and Jacob squirmed beneath him. Paul could feel the swell of his stomach between them. Jacob groaned in discomfort when Paul let his weight press down against it for the briefest moment.

The cap of the lube sounded loud in the silent room. Paul felt Jacob tense up beneath him as he coated his fingers liberally. He shushed him, straightening up and running his clean hand over Jacob's full stomach. It worked; Jacob relaxed, allowing Paul to slip one finger into him. Paul handed him another cookie to work on as he opened him up, then another. By the time Paul had three fingers into him, there was only a quarter of the packet left and it looked like Jacob was having a hard time swallowing.

Paul squeezed more lube onto his palm, stroking it up and down his cock. Jacob looked up at him, licking his lips, and Paul moved into position. It was a cacophony of firsts, so many that Paul couldn't even identify. He intended to savour it.

Paul held Jacob open and eased into him slowly. He kept one hand on his stomach, stroking him slowly to keep him relaxed. Paul inhaled deeply, forcing himself to stay calm and not just thrust into Jacob like he wanted to. Jacob gasped as Paul pushed further into him, bottoming out and pausing to let him get used to the pressure.

Before long, Jacob's hands found their way to Paul's hips, tugging insistently.

“Come on,” he said.

Paul smirked and started to move, keeping it slow if only to keep himself under control. The bulge of Jacob's stomach was obvious thanks to the position, firm at the top despite the softness of the bottom of his belly. Paul's mouth went dry as his eyes catalogued Jacob's weight gain and he couldn't help the way his hips snapped forward, plunging his cock into him.

“Unng, fuck ...” Jacob groaned, arching against Paul.

Paul wanted to be the one on his back, wanted to have Jacob on top of him, but it didn't look like he was in any state for that.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Honestly?” Jacob asked. “Heavy.”

He grinned, running a hand over his stomach and holding eye contact with Paul until he thrust hard into him again.

“You think you could handle being on top?” Paul asked.

He wasn't surprised when Jacob shook his head.

“Maybe next time?” Jacob asked. “I'm just so full ...”

Paul exhaled, knowing that Jacob was playing on it all, but it didn't make a difference. He squeezed at Jacob's hip, using the leverage to thrust into him again. There was enough flesh there for Paul to get a good grip, almost a handful. It spurred him on even more, but he forced himself to slow down.

Jacob whined, trying to thrust up onto him but Paul held him down. He slowed down to an agonisingly slow pace that took every ounce of self-restraint that he had.

“Please,” Jacob begged.

He was breathless and Paul knew he had to be close to orgasm. Instead of giving Jacob what he wanted, he dug his nails into his hip just a little, giving him a jolt of pain to push him even closer. Jacob squeezed his eyes closed, his hips leaving the bed as he bucked up.

Paul grabbed a cookie from the package and held it above his mouth. Jacob took it without question, chewing and swallowing quickly. The next two went in the same way; Jacob continued to eat whilst Paul fucked him and fed him more. Eventually, though, Jacob was obviously having trouble. He shook his head when Paul offered him another. They were down to the last three but the cookies were large and Jacob had already eaten so much.

“Soda,” Jacob prompted.

Paul stopped thrusting completely, pushing all of the way into him before reaching for the can. Jacob lifted his head just a fraction as Paul held it to his lips. He took a gulp, then another, and groaned when Paul took it away.

“I feel a little bit sick,” he said. “Carbonation probably wasn't the best idea.”

Paul put down the cookie immediately.

“Do you want to stop?” he asked.

Jacob laughed.

“No,” he said. “Give me a minute. I'm finishing them. Keep fucking me.”

Paul flinched at the order but it was Jacob so he didn't protest. He built up a steady rhythm, nothing fast enough to push Jacob over the edge. He squirmed beneath him, small, breathy noises escaping him on every thrust.

“Are you sure?” Paul asked.

“You think I've never made myself feel sick before?” Jacob asked. “It won’t stop me.”

Paul felt pride and lust fold together inside of him as he grasped Jacob's hips again, pulling him onto his cock.

“Okay,” Jacob prompted after a minute.

Paul took the cookie out of the packet again, holding it out for Jacob to bite. He went slow, so Paul did, too; the effort it was causing him was obvious. Paul knew that shouldn't have turned him on so much.

Jacob swallowed, taking another bite and groaning as Paul sped up just a little.

“I don't think I can finish the other two,” Jacob told him.

Paul tried not to let disappointment show on his face but then Jacob laughed so loudly it caught him off guard.

“I thought you of all people would be better at this,” he said.

“What?”

“I already told you, I'm going to need a little help,” Jacob said. “So help me.”

Paul picked up the penultimate cookie. Jacob's stomach looked hard and firm. He knew he wasn't joking about struggling.

He held the cookie a little closer to Jacob's mouth than before, pressing it into his lips when Jacob didn't bite it immediately. Jacob took a large bite, chewing it slowly before swallowing. He winced just a little but he took another when it was offered to him. Paul watched as he finished the cookie, taking longer than he had with any of the others.

“You might need to give me a minute,” Jacob said.

His voice was strained and his breaths were coming shallower.

Paul shook his head.

“We don't have a minute,” he said.

He wanted to come and he knew Jacob must, too. He reached down and stroked Jacob's cock, his hand bumping against his stomach on every upstroke. Jacob groaned every time his stomach jolted but he thrust into Paul's fist enthusiastically. It only took a few seconds until Jacob was panting beneath him.

“I can't,” Jacob said.

Paul believed him. His own hand was rubbing circles into his bloated stomach as he eyed the cookie with apprehension. His hips twitched when Paul held him down and Jacob whimpered as he thrust into him hard. He started to beg again when Paul took his hand off of his cock but Paul shook his head.

He held the cookie above his mouth, raising his eyebrows. Jacob tried to thrust up again but Paul's grip on him was too strong.

“Paul, please ...” he begged.

“I thought you said you wanted me to help you,” Paul replied. “Eat.”

Jacob took a shallow breath and then resigned himself to taking a bite. It was small and Paul watched him struggle, half loving it, half hoping he'd finish soon because he really wanted to see him come.

Jacob groaned when he made it to the last mouthful. Paul rubbed his stomach for him, showing mercy. As soon as Jacob swallowed, he began thrusting into him. He didn't even need to return his hand to his cock; Jacob came within seconds, clenching around Paul's cock.

It was a magnificent sight: Jacob was flushed and panting, his stuffed stomach rising and falling dramatically with each breath. Paul kept one hand on his hip, letting the other drift up to feel how even the soft underside of Jacob's belly was beginning to feel tight and bloated.

Paul's orgasm hit him as he slid his other hand down, fingers digging into the soft flesh of Jacob's thighs. When it subsided, he pulled out, quickly throwing the cookie package off of the bed before he collapsed back next to Jacob.

He was scared to look at him for a second. Jacob could be quick to panic and Paul worried that he might have pushed him too far until Jacob slid his body closer, wrapping an arm around Paul's torso. He could feel his stomach hard against his side.

“Turn over,” Paul said before reaching over to turn off the light.

Jacob did but not without a few grunts. Paul pulled him close, slipping one arm under Jacob's head and another around his middle. Jacob hummed, pleased, when Paul began to gently rub at the distended skin under his palm.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Mmm,” Jacob said. “That was good. I don't know why everyone doesn't combine food and sex, it's obviously a winner.”


End file.
